วันพฤหัสบดีที่ 28 ตุลาคม พ.ศ. 2553

Sentence Combining [A Composing Book] {William Strong} (ตอนที่ 2)

(ตอนที่ 2)

Advanced Combining 129
3.1 Defects have an effect.
3.2 The defects are hereditary.
3.3 The effect is cumulative.
3.4 The effect "snowballs."
3.5 This is according to experts.

4.1 The population grows.
4.2 Defects increase.
4.3 The increase is geometric.

5.1 Increases occur in three generations.
5.2 The increases are substantial.
5.3 The increases are in defective babies.

6.1 These defects are passed on.
6.2 They become multiplied again and again.

7.1 Modern medicine is a triumph.
7.2 It was achieved by human intelligence.
7.3 That triumph may have created problems.
7.4 The problems are horrendous.
7.5 The problems are for the future.

8.1 Medicine has upset the natural balance.
8.2 Technology has upset the natural balance.
8.3 Our survival capacity may be diminished.
Writing Tip In cluster 1, try a colon or dash for emphasis. In cluster 8, note that a compound subject requires a changed verb.
Provide a graphic example of a serious genetic defect (for example, muscular dystrophy) that will serve as a link to the "Genetic Counseling" exercise that follows.

130 Unit 3
3 Genetic Counseling

Directions "Genetic Defects" precedes this exercise. Combine sen¬
tences to create the third of four paragraphs. Then work on the Invitation
below for the' fourth paragraph.
LI Prospective parents can get advice.
1.2 They have concerns about birth defects.
1.3 The advice is from genetic counseling centers.
1.4 Centers are located throughout North America.

2.1 These people may come from families.
2.2 The families have a history of defects.
2.3 They may already have produced a child.
2.4 The child has an inherited problem.

3.1 Such centers provide information.
3.2 Information enables parents to make decisions.
3.3 The decisions are intelligent.
3.4 The decisions are socially responsible.
4*1 Genetic counseling has been successful.
4.2 The counseling is voluntary.
43 Some people now argue for genetic screening.
4.4 The screening would be mandatory.

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5.1 Such a system would grant "birth permits."
5.2 The permits would be to certain parents.
5.3 The parents are free of genetic defects. .
5.4 It would withhold permits from others.
5.5 The others carry diseases.
5.6 The diseases are hereditary.

6.1 Proponents acknowledge something.
6.2 Mandatory screening would be expensive.
6.3 It would curtail personal fredoms.
6.4 We take personal freedoms for granted.

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Advanced Combining 131
7.1 But they contend something.
7.2 The benefits outweigh the costs.
7.3 The benefits are reduced human suffering.
7.4 The benefits are a stronger gene pool.
Writing Tip Delete something in sentences 6.1 and 7.1, and use that as ,i connector. In cluster 7, try a pair of dashes for emphasis.
f ffWOdwOff Write a concluding paragraph for "Genetic Defects" md "Genetic Counseling" that sums up the problem. Share your text with .i writing partner, and use his or her feedback to revise.
O Marijuana Facts
Directions Combine sentences to create the second of four paragraphs. Then work on the Invitation below for the first paragraph. "More Mari-juana Facts" follows this exercise.
1.1 Many teenagers believe something.
1.2 Marijuana is relatively safe.
1.3 The facts suggest otherwise.

2.1 Use of the drug affects memory.
2.2 It affects one's sense of time.
2.3 It affects the ability to think.
2.4 It affects the ability to feel.

3.1 It also reduces coordination.
3.2 It also reduces concentration.
3.3 These are essential for driving.
3.4 These are essential for other tasks.

132 Vmt3
4.1 The drug weakens the motivation center.
4*2 The motivation center is in the brain.
4.3 The drug can cause permanent damage.
5.1 Typical results include listlessness.
5.2 They include learning difficulties.
5.3 They include an inability to cope.

6.1 It can also produce acute panic.
6.2 It can produce paranoia.
6.3 It can produce flashbacks.
6.4 It can produce hallucinations.

7.1 Marijuana is more harmful than tobacco.
7.2 Its smoke contains more carbon monoxide.
7.3 Its smoke contains more chemicals.
7.4 The chemicals are cancer-causing.

8.1 Inhaling the smoke can lead to emphysema.
8.2 Inhaling the smoke can lead to bronchitis.
8.3 The bronchitis is chronic.
8.4 These shorten one's life span.
Writing Tip In cluster I, delete something and use that as a connector. In clusters 2, 5, and 6, punctuate three or more items in a series.
Create a brief character sketch or dramatic incident to introduce "Marijuana Facts" and "More Marijuana Facts."
O More Marijuana Facts
Directions "Marijuana Facts" precedes this exercise. Combine sen-fences to create the third of four paragraphs. Then work on the Invitation below for the fourth paragraph.

Advanced Combining 133
1.1 "Potheads" develop a tolerance.
1.2 "Potheads" use the drug regularly.
1.3 The tolerance is for marijuana.

2.1 They need increasing amounts to get high.
2.2 They develop a dependence on the drug.
2.3 The dependence is psychological.

3.1 Not all potheads progress to other drugs.
3.2 Over half "graduate" to a drug-tree life.
3.3 Sixty percent is the exact number.

4.1 Withdrawal symptoms appear to be mild.
4.2 The withdrawal is from marijuana.
4.3 Many people conclude something.
4.4 The conclusion is erroneous.
4.5 The drug is not addictive.

5.1 The facts suggest something.
5.2 Marijuana is stored in body tissues.
5.3 Storage is for several months.
5.4 It continues to affect metabolism.

6.1 Marijuana produces the chemcal THC.
6.2 Researchers have studied THC extensively.
6.3 They have conducted controlled experiments.

7.1 Health scientists now know something.
7.2 THC lingers in body cells for 30 days.
7.3 This is after a single marijuana cigarette.
7.4 Chemical traces can still be detected.
7.5 The detection is 145 days later.

8.1 This is an important fact to know.
8.2 One is employed by a company.
8.3 The company screens for drug use.
Writing Tip In clusters 5 and 7, delete something in sentences 5.1 and 7.1. Use that connectors to make parallel clauses.

134 Unit 3
Write a concluding paragraph for "Marijuana Facts" and "More Marijuana Facts." Share your text with a writing partner, and use his or her feedback to revise,
Z> Japanese Schools
Directions Combine sentences to create the first of four paragraphs. Then work on the Invitation below for the second paragraph. "Education Commitment" follows this exercise.
LI Japanese schools reflect a society.
1.2 The society stresses literacy.
L3 The society values excellence.
L4 The excellence is in education.
2.1 High school attendance is not compulsory.
2.2 Ninety-eight percent choose to attend.
2.3 Ninety-nine percent achieve literacy.

3.1 Japan's graduation rate is 90 percent.
3.2 This compares with a 75 percent rate in the United States.

4.1 Teenagers graduate from Japanese high schools,
4.2 Many know as much as average college graduates.
4.3 The college graduates are in the United States.

5.1 Teenagers graduate from American high schools.
5.2 One in ten is functionally illiterate.
5.3 One in ten is ill-equipped for survival,

6.1 International tests indicate something,
6.2 Japanese students outperform all others.
6.3 This is particularly in math.
6.4 This is particularly in science.
6.5 These hold the keys to future technologies.

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Advanced Combining 135



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7.1 Japan has half the population of the United States.
7.2 It produces 9 percent more engineers each year.
7.3 This is a worrisome fact to Americans.
7.4 The Americans track our competitiveness.

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8.1 The Japanese believe something.
8.2 Education is a top national priority.
8.3 Effort is a major factor in learning.
8.4 Cooperation is a major factor in learning.
8.5 Self-discipline is a major factor in learning.

Writing Tip In cluster 8, delete the word something in sentence 8.1. Use that to make two parallel clauses.
invitation Create a paragraph that explores the possible threat to U.S. security as introduced by the "Japanese Schools" exercise. Then go on to the "Education Commitment" exercise.

136 Unit 3
O Education Commitment
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Directions "Japanese Schools" precedes this exercise. Combine sen-tences to create the third of four paragraphs. Then work on the Invitation below for the fourth paragraph.
1.1 Americans pay lip service to education
1.2 The Japanese act on their beliefs.
1.3 They do this in several ways.

2.1 Japanese schools run 240 days a year.
2.2 This is 60 days more than the American school year.

3.1 Mothers teach children to be gentle.
3.2 They teach children to be alert.
3.3 They teach children to be open-minded.
3.4 They also stress the value of cooperation.
4*1 Japanese parents buy books each month.
4.2 The books are for preschoolers.
4^3 They use many games and activities.
4*4 These are to teach literacy skills.
5.1 Teachers receive high salaries.
5.2 They are always accorded status.
5.3 They are always accorded respect.
5.4 Their work is seen as vital.

6.1 Japanese classes are large.
6.2 The classes average about 40 students.
6.3 Teachers take great pride in their work.
6.4 They have few discipline problems.

Advanced Combining 137
7.1 Teachers talk frequently with parents.
7.2 The parents encourage their children to study.
7.3 The parents pay for special classes.
7.4 The classes occur after school.

8.1 And Japanese students do their part.
8.2 They watch relatively little TV.
8.3 They study hard for examinations.
8.4 The examinations determine future careers.
Writing Tip In clusters 1 and 6, try several connectors—but, yet, while, although, however—before settling on one.
Write a concluding paragraph for "Japanese Schools" and "Education Commitment." Share your text with a writing partner, and use his or her feedback to revise.



■ * * *-.i -
).< • ••i »•• T UNIT FOUR Unclustered Combining 140 Unit 4 "How can I know what I think 'til I see what I say?" The question posed by novelist E. M. Forster is a good one when you stop to think about it. Sometimes we don't know what we think until our words are arrayed before us, awkward and tentative and incomplete, and we pause to look them over. It is this act that helps thinking take increasingly clear shape. The more that you regard writing as a thinking process—a way of discov¬ering meaning—the more interesting it becomes. One part of discovery is the first draft, of course. But even more exciting to many writers is the process of tinkering with meanings on the page (or word processor screen). Sometimes you can sharpen a point by adding details; sometimes you can make sentences easier to read by rearranging them; and sometimes you can delete words, phrases, or irrelevant sentences to achieve a tight, clear focus. In Unit 4 we explore the process of tinkering with paragraphs. You'll have a change to add details, rearrange sentences, and take out information that seems irrelevant to the topic at hand. But this section of combining differs from exercises in other units. Here it's your task to decide "what goes with what." You can make sentences as long or as short as you choose and arrange them in whatever ways seem interesting. A PROCESS OF TINKERING Let's look at an unclustered SC exercise to demonstrate how the process of "tinkering" works. Take a few moments to scan this brief descriptive passage and decide "what goes with what." 1. The Frisbee is flicked sideways with a motion. 2. The motion is quick and snakelike. 3. It spins clockwise. 4. It is saucerlike. 5. It rides a puddle of air. 6. It slices through sunlight. 7. It slices through shadows. 8. It glides across a grassy clearing. 9. Then a breeze catches the disk. 10. The breeze makes it climb and dip. 11. It follows the surface currents. ■ 12. It whirls soundlessly. 13. It drops lower and lower. 14. It settles onto my index finger. 15. My finger is outstretched. Dsed by >out it, I before c them
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Unclustered Combining 141
Perhaps you've spotted some "natural breaks" in the sequence above. Our aim in working with this exercise is to produce good sentences, ones that c.ipture the action.
Let's now take a careful look at the differences among three versions that h.ive been prepared for you. Which one do you, as a reader, think best L.iptures the action being described?
VERSION X, (1) The spinning, saucerlike Frisbee rides a puddle of air after being flicked sideways with a quick and snakelike motion. (2) Slicing through sunlight and shadows, it glides across a grassy clearing. (3) Then a breeze catches the disk and makes it climb and dip, following the surface currents. (4) As it whirls soundlessly, dropping lower and lower, it finally settles on my outstretched index finger.
■ i VERSION Y. (1) Flicked sideways with a quick, snakelike motion, the Frisbee spins clockwise, its saucerlike shape riding a puddle of air. (2) It slices through sunlight and shadows, gliding across a grassy clearing, and catches a breeze. (3) Then it climbs and dips to follow the surface currents, whirling lower and lower toward my outstretched index finger, where it settles soundlessly.
VERSION Z. (1) Like a sentinel, my outstretched index finger awaits the Frisbee. (2) It glides saucerlike through sunlight and shad¬ows, riding a puddle of air. (3) As it slices across a grassy clearing, a breeze catches the disk, making it climb and dip. (4) It follows the surface currents, the invisible waves and barbecue smells of a Sunday afternoon. (5) Whirling lower and lower, it finally settles soundlessly, right on target. (6) Then I flick it back, quick and snakelike.
As you know by now, each of these versions has its own unique virtues. While you may prefer Version Z because it adds details that enrich the description, you probably see that both Version X and Version Y have their own interesting features. What matters is the process of creating and comparing paragraphs like these.

A PERSONAL WRITING STYLE
The process described above—deciding "what goes with what," then tin¬kering with paragraph organization as well as sentence construction—is one that can teach you more about your own style of writing. By comparing your

142 Unit 4

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paragraphs with those of other students, you will begin to see patterns in your prose.
In doing the exercises in Unit 4, you'll find it helpful to read through an entire list of sentences before combining any of them. With the sequence in mind, look for logical "breaks" or "clusters" of meaning. Check these points lightly with a pencil. Put a question mark in areas where you're uncertain.
As you compare your paragraphs with those written by others, try to see where other writers have clustered, rearranged, or deleted sentences. If you find paragraphs that you particularly like, ask questions of your workshop partners. Get them to verbalize their thinking/writing process so you can learn from what they do.
The point of unclustered combining, remember, is not to make long sentences but rather to make good ones. Don't try to put all kernel sentences into one gigantic "supersedence." Instead, work for clarity, variety, and creativity in your paragraphs. After completing some work that represents you well, team up with others to make comparisons. Look for patterns in your writing style.
Z) Chain Saw
Personification gives human (or animal) attributes to things'or ideas. Watch for personification as you combine.
1. The chain saw snarls and bucks.
2. It bites through white fir.
3. It spits out chunks of wood.
4. High above are swaying branches.
5. They seem to tremble back and forth.
6. The saw bites deeper.
7. It makes its final cut.
8. The fir tree now groans,
9. The fir tree now begins to teeter.

10. The saw rips still deeper.
11. It tears at the fir's heartwood.
12. The tree sways again.
13. It hesitates breathlessly.
14. A shudder passes down its length.
15. The saw shuts down with a gasp.
16. The fir's groan becomes a cracking.

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Unclustered Combining 143



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17. The cracking is long and splintered.
18. Its inner core gives way to gravity.
19. Its lean is imperceptible at first.
20. Gravity's pull is inexorable.


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Finish this description of the falling fir tree, contin-uing the use of personification.
O Desperate Chef
When George's wife is away, he must fend for himself. Once again, he meets the challenge with characteristic manly grace.
1.' George wandered into the kitchen. 2. He took a recipe book from the shelf.

144 Unit 4
3. He thumbed its worn pages aimlessly.
4. In the refrigerator he found dry carrots.
5. In the refrigerator he found a potato.
6. In the refrigerator he found limp celery.
7. In the refrigerator he found yellow onions.
8. In the refrigerator he found flank steak.
9. The steak was just on the edge of spoiling.

10. He promptly cut up all of this.
11. He heated an iron kettle on the stove.
12. He seared the red cubes of beef.
13. He added two handfuls of onions.
14. The onions steamed and sizzled.
15. George then felt a flash of inspiration.
16. George uncorked a bottle of cheap red wine.
17. He splashed its dregs into the kettle.
18. The kitchen now reeked of charred meat.
19. George smiled in a satisfied way.
20. George added the stew's final ingredients.
Describe how George prepares a dessert to accom¬pany this elegant supper; or describe the kitchen's aftermath.
Z> Hawaiian Hula
The chanter recites to the rhythmic beating of a drum, and dancers swirl and sway as one, interpreting the past. Welcome to the hula.
1. Hawaii is famous for the hula.
2. The hula is an elegant dance.
3. It expresses the culture of the islands.
4. It expresses the history of the islands.
5. It expresses the stories of the islands.
6. Missionaries suppressed this native dance.
7. This was during the nineteenth century.
8. They did not understand its complexity.
9. They did not understand its significance.

Uncluttered Combining 145
10. It was saved from extinction by Kalakaua.
11. Kalakaua was a Hawaiian monarch.
12. He called it "the language of the heart."
13. Today's Hawaiians perform two types of hula.
14. Each has its unique style.
15. The ancient style is called hula kahiko.
16. It is accompanied only by chanting.
17. It is accompanied only by drumming.
18. The modern style is called hula auana.
19. It is more fluid and sensuous.
20. It is accompanied by musical instruments.
Speculate on the motives of missionaries for suppress¬ing the expression of native Hawaiians; then comment on the morality of such actions from today's perspective,

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Z> Opposite Personalities

Do you have friends or family members who almost always see things in a positive (or negative) light? How do you see things?

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1. The world has two kinds of people.
2. One kind is the optimist.
3. The other kind is the pessimist.
4. An optimist is a person.
5. The person sees a water glass.
6. The water glass is partially filled.
7. The person declares it "half full."
8. A pessimist sees the same glass.
9. The pessimist declares it "half empty."

10. Such statements describe differences in perception.
11. Such statements describe differences in personality.
12. The differences are not in physical reality.
13. Optimism is a way of seeing the world.
14. Optimism is a way of processing the world.
15. So is pessimism.

146 Unit 4

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Pessimism is the alternative view.
17. Both have influences on human behavior.
18. The influences are profound.
19. A brief illustration should clarify this point.
20. The illustration is personal.

Develop a follow-up illustration from your own expe¬rience to clarify the ideas being introduced in this paragraph. Show how attitude can shape behavior.

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Z> Morning Shower

The offri

One way to hook reader interest is to use strategic surprise. Here is a quiet, relaxed scene—a backdrop for a personal decision.
1. She was in the shower.
2. A warm torrent burbled over her head.

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Unclustered Combining 147

3. It foamed sheets of water down her body.
4. She relaxed under the noise.
5. She was unable to think about anything.
6. Her consciousness was focused on the spray.
7. The spray was prickly.
8. The spray needled her back.
' 9. She hummed to herself.
10. She turned slowly under the showerhead.
11. The showerhead gushed.
12. It was as if she4 were basting on a barbecue.
13. The air tasted wet and clean.
14* She closed her eyes.
15. The world seemed simple.
16. The simplicity was perfect.
17. It was without anger.
18. It was without accusations.
19. It was without thoughtless remarks.
20. There was nothing but sensation.
21. The sensation was pure.
22. She stood that way for a long time.
23. She listened to the sound of water.
24* The water gurgled down the drain.
25. She knew what she had to do.

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invitation Extend this narrative by imagining what the young woman's decision is. You may wish to use your own experience as you develop this story.

O Orchard Memory

a quiet,

The sense of smell can trigger deep memories. Try to remember the smells of fresh-baked bread, chalk trays in school, juicy apples.
1. The orchard stood behind a white frame house.
2. The house belonged to my grandparents.
3. My grandfather had planted it.
4. He had cared for it most of his life.
5. This was in spite of Grandma's protests.

148 Unit 4
6. Its trees were gnarled and bent.
7. Its trees were not very productive.
8. They left me with great memories.
9. I could explore a new tree each day.

10. I could listen to the bees work.
11. This was my favorite place in late summer.
12. This was my favorite place in early fall.
13. The days were long and sleepy.
14. I could wander by myself.
15. I could play with my friends.
16. Apples hung heavy from the boughs.
17. They were ready for picking.
18. I remember the air as sweet.
19. I remember the air as heavy.
20. It was full of green shadows.
21. It smell of ripe fruit.
22. I wiped the apple juice.
23. The juice ran down my chin.
24. I could see leaves beginning to curl.
25. I could see leaves beginning to turn golden.

Unclustered Combining 149
Think of a favorite place from your childhood. Be there again, recalling smells if possible. Write about this place from a first-person ("I") point of view.
0 Winning Attitude
Coaches talk about a winning attitude. Is there such a thing? Can you feel it sometimes in other people? What is a winning attitude?
1. Mona sees herself as a winner.
2. Mona sees herself not as a loser.
3. Her self-image is strong and upbeat.
4« Her self-image is decidedly optimistic.
5. She knows her strengths.
6. She acknowledges her weaknesses.
7. She sets goals for herself.
8. The goals are realistic and achievable.
9. Her toughness comes from an attitude.

10. Her attitude is resilient.
11. It tells her to bounce back.
12. Things don't go her way.
13. She learns from her difficulties.
14* She doesn't take them personally.
15. She doesn't let them demoralize her.
16. She sees mistakes as learning opportunities.
17. She doesn't regard them as traumatic events.
18. Mona has average talents.
19. Mona has ordinary levels of skill.
20. Mona has unusual personal poise.
21. This is for one simple reason.
22. She knows who she is.
23. She likes who she is.
24. She long ago realized something.
25. Winning is a state of mind.
26. It is a willingness to persevere.
27. It is a reluctance to give up.
28. This attitude makes her a team player.

150 Unit 4
29. The attitude is aggressively positive.
30. The player pulls her weight at the office.
31. The player gives to her community.
32. Mona will ultimately succeed.
33. She has the right attitude toward life.
34. "Be a winner."
35. "Don'tbeawhiner."
invitation In a follow-up paragraph, contrast Mona with a per¬son who is a "loser" in his or her approach to life. Try to develop your character sketch with specific, vivid examples'.
Z) Ginseng Special
Visiting a health food store, you're sure to see advertisements for ginseng.
But what is it? And is it for you?
1. Ginseng has been used for over 5000 years.
2. Ginseng means "manroot" in Chinese.
3. Its use has been mainly in the Orient.
4. The root has been called "the elixir of life."
5. It supposedly possesses medicinal powers.
6. The powers are extraordinary.
7. The powers improve one's health.
8. Ginseng is like Geritol in many Asian households.
9. Ginseng is like aspirin in many Asian households.

10. Ginseng is used to remedy "tired blood."
11. Ginseng is used to treat pain.
12. Ginseng is used to treat flagging virility.
13. The root is widely available today.
14. It is often soaking in water or rice wine.
15. This has not always been the case.
16. Ginseng was once regarded as royal property.
17. Ginseng was exchanged between royal families.
18. Ginseng was a symbol of respect.
19. Commoners were severely punished.

Unclustered Combining 151



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20. The commoners possessed ginseng.
21. Today it is available in tea.
22. It is available in soft drinks.
23. It is available in dried form.
24. It can also be eaten raw.
25. It can be cooked in other foods.
26. It can be boiled to make an extract.
27. Many Westerners remain skeptical of ginseng.
28. They dismiss its reported claims.
29. Some scientists continue to study its properties.
30. The scientists are Russian.
31. The properties are health-related.
Visit a health food store to learn more about the cost of ginseng—brace yourself—and its properties. Put what you learn into a follow-up paragraph.

152 Unit 4
Z> Tying the Knot
• ******* M 1 •*#**• *** * **#* •+•**+****+**«* ******** ■ — ***■ ■ *********** ■
A marriage marks a turning point, "for better or for worse," in the life story of many people. Make a prediction about this one.
1. The groom waits in the church vestibule.
2. His waiting is anxious.
3. The groom tries to smile.
4. Sweat stands out on his forehead.
5. He blinks.
6. He fidgets with his black bow tie.
7. The cue comes from the organist.
8. The best man opens the door.
9. The two take their places at the altar.

10. The altar is opposite the oak pulpit.
11. Eyes turn toward the groom,
12. The eyes are silent.
13. He glances toward the church entrance.
14. People are clustered there.
15. The bride appears in a silk gown.
16. The silk is milk-white.
17. The bridesmaids lead the procession.
18. They rustle down the center aisle.
19. They wear dresses of yellow pastels.
20. They carry bouquets of fresh daisies.
21. The daisies look like sunny faces.
22. Familiar music swells through the church.
23. The music is "Here Comes the Bride."
24. Behind her veil the bride bites her lip.
25. The bride manages a brave smile.
26. Her father looks on.
27. Her father is a stern man.
28. The man is shovel-faced.
29. She approaches the altar.
30. Her future husband awaits.
You can extend this narrative with additional de-scription or use it to introduce your views about marriage and divorce in today's world.

Unclustered Combining 153
O Parable 3
Writers have long used fables and parables to make important points in subtle and memorable ways. What is the point here?
1. A fruit seller once lived in Hangchow.
2. The seller knew how to keep oranges.
3. The oranges kept for a whole year.
4. They did not wither or spoil.
5. The fruit always looked fresh.
6. The fruit always looked firm.
7. It was actually dry inside.
8. Its dryness was like an old cocoon.
9* Something happened one day.
10. A customer criticized the seller.
11. The customer was irate.
12. The criticism was loud.
13. "You have created an illusion."
14. "The illusion is outrageous."
15. "The illusion deceives the public."
16. "Your only purpose is to cheat fools."
17* "The fools have worked hard for their money."

154 Unit 4
18. The seller replied in this way.
19. The seller was hunched and wrinkled.
20. "Our officials sit in lofty halls."
21. "They ride magnificent horses."
22. "They get drunk on fine wine."
23. "They stuff themselves with succulent food."
24. "Our officials know no shame."
25. "They eat the bread of state."
26. "They instead put on awe-inspiring looks."
27. "The looks are an illusory display of greatness."
28. "The looks are an illusory display of worth."
29. Then the seller laughed.
30. "You pay no heed to things of importance."
31. "You are concerned about matters."
32. "The matters are trivial."

Try to generalize (or draiJv a moral) from this simple parable. What do you take as its "point"?

othei



Z> Karate Explained
How is it that some people can break boards and bricks with their hands? Read on and combine.

Twei mucl

1. Karate is an ancient Asian art.
2. It means "empty hand."
3. It involves using body parts.
4. The use is to break hard objects.
5. Okinawa was occupied by Japanese samurai.
6. This was during the seventeenth century.
7. Citizens turned their hands into weapons.
8. Citizens turned their feet into weapons.
9. The weapons could smash bamboo armor.

10. A karate "chop" involves a thrust.
11. The thrust is short and sharp.
12. The hand remains as rigid as possible.
13. Its rigidity is at the moment of impact.
14. The same principle holds for the foot.

Unclustered Combining 155
15. The foot delivers more force.
16. It has greater mass.
17. A karate expert uses his entire body.
18. This is when delivering a blow.
19. This chop must be extremely short.
20. This chop must be extremely swift.
21. This is to accomplish' its task.
22. This is to prevent bodily injury.
23. Contact with a brick lasts for only a flash.
24. It is less than ten one-thousandths of a second.
25. The hand recoils at nearly 200 miles per hour.
26. A human hand can withstand a ton of force.
27. The hand has highly elastic boftes.
28. It must be rigid and quick to do so.
invitation Can you apply the underlying principles of karate to other areas of your physical, mental, or spiritual life?
O World Population
Twenty million people now live in Mexico City. And the situation will get much worse before it gets better. Why is this?
1. The world's population continues to grow.
2. The rate of growth is alarming.
3. This is particularly in Third World countries.
4. The level of poverty is staggering.
5. Population passed 1 billion in 1800. ^
6. It passed 2 billion in 1920.
7. It passed 3 billion in 1960.
8. World population today numbers 5 billion,
9. It will increase to 8 billion by 2025.

10. Present rates suggest a doubling of population.
11. The doubling is within 35 years.
12. About 95 percent of this will be in the Third World.
13. Bangladesh is smaller than Wisconsin.
14. Bangladesh now supports 115 million people.
15. Bangladesh will face 250 million people by 2025.

156 Unit 4

16. Mexico faces similar population pressures.
17. Mexico now has about 85 million people.
18. It will have 150 million hungry mouths by 2025
19. Equally bleak is the situation in India.
20. India presently has 880 million people.
21. It wilt eventually surpass China.
22. China now has 1.17 billion people.
23. China now has a slower growth rate.
24. Populations are also exploding in Africa.
25. Populations are also exploding in Latin America
26. These areas have seen overgrazing.
27. These areas have seen soil erosion.
28. These areas have seen forest destruction,
29. Such damage has long-term consequences.
30. The damage is to the environment.
31. It increases the possibility of famines.
32. The famines would be catastrophic.

Unclustered Combining 157
33. The famines would be similar to those in Somalia.
34. Overcrowding also leads to flows of refugees.
35. The flows are ceaseless.
36. The flows are into industrialized countries.
37. The industrialized countries cannot handle them.
38. World population is like a time bomb.
39. The time bomb is ticking.
40. Natural resources are dwindling.
41. Population pressures are rapidly increasing.
I tUhlvOXt/QK Should the United States take an active role in helping Third World nations to control world population growth? What .specific dangers do you see in unrestrained growth in world population?
O First Light
It's the hour before dawn when night reaches its darkest point—like a black velvet backdrop for an unfolding array of first light.
1. The night had been black.
2. It had been brittle-cold.
3. It had been pierced by slivers of light.
4. The light was from the city.
5. Trains rumbled in the switchyard.
6. They moved freight down steel rails.
7. The rails glittered.
8. A siren wailed in the distance.
9. Its sound rose and fell.

10. Its sound trailed off into silence.
11. The silence was empty.
12. Taxicabs rolled down streets.
13. The streets were bare and deserted.
14. The desertion seemed ominous.
15. Their headlights fanned the buildings.
16. Garbage trucks made their rounds.
17. The rounds were preappointed.
18. The rounds were nightly.
19. They lumbered past alleys.

158 Unit 4
20. The homeless huddled in packing crates.
21. The packing crates were cardboard.
22. The homeless tried to keep warm.
23. Then the blackness began to soften.
24. The blackness was in the east.
25. It became a deep charcoal gray.
26. The gray was the color of soot.
27. The sky lightened further.
28. It revealed the outline of buildings.
29. They were black against the horizon.
30. Gray then warmed to a soft grayish rose.
31. It was like the stain of old wine.
32. Dawn backlighted a layer of clouds.
33. Dawn worked its way across the horizon.
34. The work was inexorable.
35. The light was alabaster and white.
36. The light was pink and pale yellow.
37. It was like the inside of an oyster shell.
38. "This is incredible," the director whispered.
39. Her smile stretched ear to ear.
40. The cameraman narrowed his eyes.
41. The cameraman touched his forehead.
42. "Uh, I think I forgot to load the camera.'1
Do you know about great expectations and missed opportunities? Focus on this idea as you parallel "First Light."
O Video Dating
Can you see yourself shopping for companionship through a catalog? Outra¬geous? Maybe in the Age of AIDS the idea has more merit.
1. Video dating is an approach to romance,
2. The approach is scientific.
3. It helps some people meet new friends.
4. This is for a membership fee.
5. Clients fill out questionnaires.
6. The questionnaires are about themselves.

Uncluttered Combining 159
7. The questionnaires are called Member Profiles.
8. Clients are then interviewed on videotape.
9. Member Profiles are filed in a notebook.

10. The notebook is alphabetized.
11. One uses the notebook as a card catalog.
12. The catalog is for the videotape library.
13. One first reads biographical information.
14. One then views various videotapes.
15. The videotapes are for prospective dates.
16. One makes a tentative selection.
17. The dating service sends the client a card.
18. The client then comes to the dating service.
19. The client examines the chooser's Member Profile.
20. The client views the chooser's videotape.
21. The client decides whether to accept a date.
22. The dating service releases phone numbers.
23. The release is on one condition.
24. Both parties want to meet.
25. No date can be arranged without this agreement.
26. The dating service protects clients' identities.
27. It assigns each person an ID number.
28. Advocates of the service contend this.
29. Video dating provides one-stop shopping.
30. The shopping is for consumers.
31. The consumers are value-oriented.
32. It offers a rational alternative.
33. The alternative is to barhopping.
34. The alternative is to church socials.
35. It is here to stay.
Video dating is alive and well in many big cities. In follow-up writing, prepare a Member Profile for yourself. Or, if you'd prefer, discuss what video dating reveals about our society.
O Apartment 7
How can you use writing to take readers on a "guided tour" of a physical location? It helps to focus on specific details.

160 Unit 4
1. Apartment 7 had been the height of fashion.
2. The fashion was 25 years ago.
3. Now it just looked faded and tired.
4. Now it just looked a little cluttered.
5. There was a faded Oriental carpet.
6. It covered oak squares in the living room.
7. There were paperback books on pine shelves.
8. The pine shelves had brick spacers.
9. There was a curtain of colored beads.
10. There was a Tiffany-style lamp.
11* The lamp was made from a kit.
12. The walls were decorated with posters.
13. The walls were bone-white.
14. The posters showed faraway destinations.
15. The posters showed gray beaches.
16. The beaches were shrouded by fog.


Unclustered Combining 161
17. A smell of incense filled the room.
18. It was faint and exotic.
19. In the corner stood a wooden cabinet.
20. It held an ancient FM tuner.
21. It held a tape deck with an open lid.
22. It held uneven stacks of cassette tapes.
23. The furniture was odds and ends.
24. It had no unifying theme.
25. There was an overstuffed chair.
26. It had a floral covering.
27. There was a sofa bed.
28. It had seen better days.
29. There was a pair of bentwood chairs.
30. There was a small kitchen table.
31. It doubled as a desk.
32. Apartment 7 was not like my place.
33. My place was across town.
34. I would get used to its quirkiness.
35. Its quirkiness was a throwback to the 1970s,
Uwtafa
*I0K Using "Apartment 7" as model, describe the place where you live. Imagine a camera scanning the room. To organize this writing, move systematically, positioning objects for the reader.
O Homeless
Have you ever wondered about the life stories of homeless people you see in any American city? How did they get there? And why?
1. The public library closes its doors.
2. A homeless man heads out into a cold night.
3. Neon lights flicker against the sky.
4. The traffic flows by in a stream.
5. The stream is ceaseless.
6. His tiredness is a numb ache.
7. It stretches down his back.
8. It reaches all the way to his feet.
9. Above the storefronts are buildings.


162 Unit 4

10. The storefronts are barricaded.
11. The buildings are faceless.
12. The buildings house offices.
13. The offices are like the one he once knew.
14. His life now feels like a bad dream.
15. The dream has no awakening.
16. It has no room for family or friends.
17. His focus is survival.
18. His focus is one meal at a time.
19. His focus is a safe place out of the wind.
20. He can close his eyes there.
21. Now he pulls a wool cap over his ears,
22. He turns up his jacket collar.
23. He jams gloved fists deep into his pockets.
24. He shuffles toward the Gospel Mission.
25. It is a place of refuge.
26. The refuge is temporary.
27. Hunger is his constant companion.
28. Loneliness is his constant companion.
29. He has never been a good panhandler,
30. Tonight he feels more desperate than usual.
31. He hangs out near a fast-food restaurant.

Unclustered Combining 163
32. He coaxes a quarter here and there.
33. This is until the police run him off.
34. Then he coughs into his clenched fists.
35. He slips the coins into his boot.
36. He stumbles off toward the Mission.
Write about this man's story as you imagine it (or as you know it from the stories of others). Does such a story make you worry about your own future—or the future of those you love?
Some people speculate that black holes are points of entry to other uni-verses—or to the past or future in our own universe. Read on.
1. Black holes are dying stars.
2. The stars have collapsed inward.
3. They have created pits in space.
4. The pits are bottomless.
5. Nothing can escape black holes.
6. Not even light can escape black holes.
7. Light travels at 186,000 miles per second.
8. They are called "the last laugh of the cosmos."
9. The black hole has a gravitational pull.

10. The gravitational pull is incredible.
11. It sucks up all matter within reach.
12. It sucks up all energy within reach.
13. It is like a cosmic vacuum cleaner.
14. Scientists infer that black holes exist.
15. Light cannot escape them.
16. X-ray measurements provide observational data.
17. Current theories suggest something.
18. Matter emits x-rays.
19. Matter swirls around a black hole.
20. Matter is heated to billions of degrees.
21. Such x-ray emissions were first detected in 1967.
22. Detection was in the constellation Cygnus.
23. Similar findings have since occurred elsewhere.

164 Unit 4
24. Scientists now believe something.
25. Deep inside each black hole is "singularity."
26. "Singularity" is a region of extreme density.
27. The laws of physics break down there.
28. A teaspoon of matter weighs billions of tons.
29. Our galaxy's hole may be three times our sun's mass.
30. It may be less than one-fiftieth its size.
Congratulations! NASA has invited you to partici-pate in a mission "that will explore the perimeter of a newly discovered black hole." Accept or decline the offer in follow-up writing.
D Bar Incident
It's not a pretty sight—someone who has had too much to drink. But clear
narration can move us from dry statistics to human realities.
1. The man slumps against the bar.
2. He is middle-aged.
3. He is a construction worker.
4. He wears his hard hat like a badge.
5. He slurps his drink.
6. It is his fifth of the evening.
7. His face is puffy.
8. His face is sun-weathered.
9. His face has started to show its age.

10. Age shows at the corners of his eyes.
11. His eyes are glassy and unfocused.
12. A tangled web of sounds surrounds him.
13. The sounds are loud voices.
14. The sounds are TV newscasters.
15. The sounds are country and western music,
16. A drunken grin spreads across his mouth.
17. It cracks through his depression.
18. He leans precariously to one side.
19. He begins to surrender to dizziness.
20. He then catches himself.
21. He mumbles aloud.

Unclustered Combining 165

partici-:overed
ar
it cle


22. He repeats himself.
23. "Need a little sleep."
24. Then he wobbles to his feet.
25. He braces himself against the bar.
26. The bar is covered with glasses.
27. The glasses are stained and empty.
28. He stares at the young bartender.
29. The bartender is clearing away the debris.
30. The worker finishes off his drink.
31. The worker pushes his glass forward.
32. The worker demands "one for the road."
33. The bartender shakes his head no.
34. The bartender polishes the counter.
35. The counter is smooth and dark.
36. The bartender turns away.
37. Several seconds tick by.
38. The worker bristles in the mirror.
39. He clenches his fist around the glass.
40. His face darkens with blood.
41 • His angry breathing quickens.

Consider using this incident as an opener for "Alco-hol Facts" in Unit 3. Or continue this story with follow-up writing.
The sun is bright, and the air is warm. Light shimmers on the lake's rippled
surface as the powerboat driver revs up the powerful engine.
1. The water-skier bobs in the water.
2. The water-skier looks like a yellow cork.
3. A life vest is bunched up near her ears.
4. Her muscles are tensed and ready.
5. The powerboat lurches forward.
6. The rope's slack suddenly tightens.
7. The water drags against her.
8. It is like a lover's embrace.
9. The embrace is smothering.
10. Suddenly she pulls herself up.

166 Unit 4

11. She is skimming its surface.
12. She is trying not to make any mistakes.
13. She leans lightly to one side.
14. She veers outward.
15. She crosses the boat's wake.
16. Then she dips back the other way.
17. She glides across a light chop.
18. A fine spray trails behind her.
19. It is silver in the afternoon sun.
20. Her hair flattens against her forehead.
21. She sways left and right like a dancer.
22. She glimpses her reflection on the water.
23. It looks like liquid glass.
24. It gleams beneath her skis.
25. It glitters beneath her skis.
26. Now she tightens her grip on the tow bar.
27. She lifts one ski slightly.
28. She leans against the boat's pull.
29. Her ski tip flicks a wave top.
30. It shatters her glassy reflection.
31. Then it is back better than ever.
32. Her hair is streaming behind her.
33. She finally signals "in."
34. The boat makes a wide turn.
35. It angles directly toward shore.
36. It then makes a sudden swerve.
37. The swerve takes it back to open water.
38. The skier holds on to the last moment.
39. Then she drops the rope.
40. She glides upright toward the beach.
41. She sinks slowly in the green water.
42. She feels the wash from the boat.
43. It laps against her back.
44. She slaps the water with her hand.
45. She shouts a whoop of joy.
46. "I did it."

Maki: cess.'
N

Using "Water-Skier" as a model, describe a chal-lenge that gave you the fierce joy of real personal victory—a sense, perhaps, of having conquered your own fears.

Unclustered Combining \ 67
Z> The Potter
Making something from nothing—that's what we call "the creative pro-cess." Such magic can even happen with a simple lump of clay.
1. The potter hunches over his clay.
2. He adds drops of water to its surface.
3. The surface glistens beneath his fingers.
4. The gooey lump turns on the wheel.
5. The gooey lump is smoothed by hands.
6. The hands are slender and graceful.
7. The hands are always moving.
8. His brow wrinkles with concentration.
9. The clay becomes a slimy mess.

10. It is still solid.
11. It is now assuming liquid qualities.
12. He intends to shape these qualities.
13. He centers the soggy cone of clay.
14. It writhes against his fingertips.
15. His fingertips are carefully cupped.
16. He makes an indentation with his thumbs.
17. The clay begins to flatten.


168 Unit 4
18. It spreads against his palms.
19. He pushes slightly deeper.
20. Clay walls grow toward an overhead light.
21. He uses his thumbs and fingers.
22. His hands guide the clay's progress.
23. They shape it into a cylinder.
24. The cylinder is narrow at the base.
25. The cylinder widens toward the top.
26. One hand enters the turning shape.
27. The other pushes gently from the outside.
28. It leaves traces of fingertips.
29. The potter works the shape with care.
30. It broadens into an elegant bowl.
31. The bowl is thhvwalled.
32. The bowl has a slightly curved lip.
33. The lip is like a child's pout.
34. The shape is now curved and magical.
35. The shape is beneath the potter's hands.
36. The shape responds to his slightest touch.
37. Finally the wheel slows to a stop.
38. The potter's face is smiling.
39. The potter's face is tranquil.
40. The wrinkles have momentarily vanished.
41. The wrinkles had creased his brow earlier.
fKwtafa
Like working with clay, the writer's work is also a creative process. Can you compare what you do in writing with the shaping described above? Describe how you see your creativity.
O Coming Home
Has your home ever been burglarized or vandalized? If so, you probably know the feelings of disgust and anger: How come? Why me?
1. She stepped over a broken door.
2. She stepped through a doorway.
3. She came home to a cabin.

T

Unclustered Combining 169
4. The cabin had one room.
5. Its interior was dark and musty.
6. There was a hole in the ceiling.
7. The hole was splintered.
8. Chimney stones had come through.
9. Dust danced in a shaft of sunlight.

10. Standing near the door was a stove.
11. The stove was a wood burner.
12. It had broken sections of stovepipe.
13. The stovepipe was covered with soot.
14. An old cupboard stood in the corner,
15. The glass was smashed from its doors.
16. Inside it were mismatched dishes.
17. Inside it were shattered mugs.
18. Inside it was a rock from the chimney.
19. Along the back wall was another hole.
20. The hole had once been a window.
21. Beneath it was a square table.
22. It had one leg kicked out.
23. Its top tilted downward.
24. Its top touched the floor.
25. A small iron bed was tipped over.
26. Its mattress was ripped open.
27. The mattress was gray and sagging.
28. Its stuffing was strewed everywhere.
29. She stared down at a wooden floor.
30. It was cracked and warped.
31. She wondered why someone had done this.
32. The cabin hadn't been much to begin with.
33. It was something she had helped build.
34. Now it was her inheritance to fix up.
35. First she'd have to deal with tears.
In follow-up writing, describe what you see as the root causes for senseless vandalism. Or, if you'd prefer, narrate the details of a time when you had a terrible surprise like this.

170 Unit 4
Z> American Pace
The following piece of persuasive writing uses parallelism to drive home its
point. For more on parallelism, see Appendix B.
1. Some people say something.
2. America is a desirable place to live.
3. It affords us basic freedoms.
4. The freedoms are unparalleled elsewhere.
5. Others argue something.
6. America is desirable.
7. Its living standard is very high.
8. This is compared with the standards of other nations.
9. The nations are highly industrialized.

10. Still others contend something.
11. America's desirability lies in its diversity.
12. The diversity is extraordinary.
13. The diversity is in people.
14. The diversity is in life-styles.
15. The diversity is in geography.
16. All of these statements may be true.
17. They ignore an erosion of community spirit.
18. The erosion seems to exist in many towns.
19. The erosion seems to exist in many cities.
20. We Americans have always been individualists.
21. Today's individualism is less generous.
22. Today's individualism is greedier.


Uncluttered Combining 171
23. Many of us live at a frantic pace.
24. We careen like billiard balls through life.
25. Our handshakes are often obligatory.
26. Our handshakes are often hurried.
27. Our eyes flit from place to place.
28. They rarely pause for human contact.
29. Our talk is often silly and superficial.
30. Our talk is filled with cliches.
31. Our leisure is often spent on entertainment.
32. The entertainment is mindless.
33. The entertainment comes from TV dramas.
34. The entertainment comes from video stores.
35. The entertainment comes from music channels.
36. Our vacations are often a race.
37. The race is high-speed.
38. The race is from place to place,
39. Our vacations are not a spiritual renewal.
40. Our work is often something to be done with.
41. Our work is not a source of personal pride.
42. Our relationships are often mechanical.
43. Our relationships are often machine-stamped.
44. We assess what others can do for us.
45. Gone is the sense of real community.
46. Americans once shared this sense.
invitation Choose an approach for follow-up writing that re-sponds to "American Pace": (1) discuss the causes of the problem, or (2) discuss your solutions to it.


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Practice

174 Unit 5
Most of us like to think of ourselves as individualists. In reality, however, much of what we learn comes from imitating, either consciously or uncon-sciously, what others do. We walk and talk and dress like those whom we admire, and we serve as apprentices to on-the-job coaches in schools, offices, and fast-food stores. Others show us how; we imitate.
What works in the world at large also works in writing. It was well over 2000 years ago that Greek and Roman teachers hit upon a powerful way to teach writing to students of that era. Extensive practice and immediate feedback were its key features. Students were asked to read and copy "model" writings of the day. Then they were told to imitate this exemplary prose.
We'll use a modern version of this time-proven method in Unit 5 activities. All exercises in this section derive from the work of skilled contemporary writers. Your first task is to do the combining as usual. Your second task is to compare your sentences with those o{ other students and with those provided by your instructor.
A WRITING APPRENTICESHIP
Think of Unit 5 exercises as an apprenticeship. The basic idea is to compare your style of writing with the style of various professionals. Sometimes you'll find similarities, sometimes not; but either way, you'll learn. The line-by¬line comparison will teach you about the craft of writing by helping you understand your personal style of sentence construction.
This is not to say, of course, that the professional writer's sentences represent the "right answer" or the "best way" to combine a given set of sentences. In fact, with serious effort and the help of workshop partners, you may sometimes create sentences that are superior to the original ones. The point is that the original sentences are ones you can learn from, a standard against which you can measure your own efforts.
To illustrate what a recombining exercise looks like, here's a very brief example from Survive the Savage Sea, an exciting book by Dougal Robert-son. The exercise opens with a bit of context to establish the scene. Please note that this exercise is unclustered (like the ones in Unit 4).
Context I had two large hooks leftf and as I watched the long sleek shape of the sharks glide slowly by I resolved to keep them for another day.
1. One shark turned again.
2. It cruised toward the dinghy.

T
Recombining Practice 175
Dwever, 3. Its speed was leisurely.
uncon- 4. Its fin knifed the sea.
iom we 5. I grabbed the spear.
ichools, 6. I struck savagely at its snout.
7. The shark went past the boat.
ell over 8. It flipped its tail wildly.
way to 9. It was surprised.
nediate 10. It dived deep.
d copy 11. The other two cruised not far behind.
:mplary 12. They kept a respectful distance.
13. I made the transit back to the raft.
Unit 5 14. I brought the fish.
skilled 15. The fish were newly caught.
1. Your 16. The fish were for our lunch.
ats and
How would you capture the tension of this moment? Can you hear the
sentences forming in your mind?

)mpare s you'll ine-by' rig you
itences set of rtners, [ ones. •om, a
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hape of

MAKING COMPARISONS
Let's now make sentence-by-sentence comparisons between two versions. After reading both paragraphs in their entirety, go back for a second look. Decide which version you prefer and why.
COMBINED VERSION. (1) Turning, one shark cruised toward the dinghy. (2) Its speed was leisurely; its fin knifed the sea. (3) As it went past the boat, I grabbed the spear and struck at its snout savagely. (4) The shark was surprised. (5) It flipped its tail wildly and dived deep. (6) The other two, cruising not far behind, kept a respectful distance while I made the transit back to the raft, bringing fish that were newly caught for our lunch.
ORIGINAL VERSION. [1] One shark turned again and cruised at a leisurely speed toward the dinghy, its fin knifing the surface of the sea. [2] I grabbed the spear and struck savagely at its snout as it went past; the surprised shark flipped its tail wildly and dived deep, the two others cruising not far behind as 1 made the transit back to the raft with the newly caught fish for our lunch.
One point of comparison is the number of sentences in the two versions. Do you favor more sentences—or fewer, longer ones? Try to find one sentence in each version that you especially like and one that you dislike.

176 Unit 5

Why do particular sentences either work or not work for you? Is it wording, sentence rhythm, or the "fit" in context?
When you find a sentence that you like, why not copy it into your notebook? Such a sentence might be the first one that Dougal Robertson writes. Notice how the absolute construction (its fin knifing the surface of the sea) provides the detail that brings the rest of the sentence to life. This is a sentence worth imitating. By doing so, you train yourself in sentence construction, adding to the skills that you can draw on later.
In working through the exercises in Unit 5, you will find some long sequences of sentences. Do not panic. Instead, think back to the combining you did in Unit 4, and approach the task slowly, deciding where to break a sequence into manageable clusters that you can combine in a meaningful way.
As always, remember that sentence combining is an option, never a require¬ment, You're the decision maker. [Note: The italized material within the Unit 5 selections is reprinted with the permission of the authors and publishers. Credits appear on page 235.]

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Shi
Memoirs of a Childhood
among Ghosts,
by Maxine Hong Kingston
In her first year of American school, Maxine Ting Ting Hong spoke to no one and flunked kindergarten. From 5:00 to 7:30 p.m. each day, she also attended Chinese school, "where we chanted together, voices rising and falling, loud and soft." Her beautifully written memoir, The Woman War¬rior\ pulls together such experiences.
Directions Carefully read the context sentences below, listening to rhythm and pattern. Then combine sentences. Finally, compare your sen¬tences with those of other students and with Maxine Hong Kingston's original text (provided by your instructor).

Context Not all of the children who were silent at American school found voice in Chinese school One new teacher said each of us had to get up and recite in front of the class, who was to listen. M^ sister and I had memorized the lesson

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Recombinmg Practice 177
o your on the se
)ertson
e of the 1.
his is a 2.
ntence 3.
4.
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.bining 6.
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lingful 8.
9.
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tin the 11.
rs and 12.
13.
perfectly. We said it to each other at home, one chanting, one listening. The teacher called on my sister to recite first. It was the first time a teacher had called on the second-bom to go first.
My sister was scared.
She glanced at me,
She looked away.
I looked down at my desk.
I hoped that she could do it.
If she could, then I would have to.
She opened her mouth.
A voice came out.
It wasn't a whisper.
It wasn't a proper voice either.
I hoped that she would not cry.
The fear would break up her voice.
It would be like twigs underfoot.
She sounded as if she were trying to sing through weeping or strangling.
14. She did not pause to end the embarrassment.
15. She did not stop to end the embarrassment.
16. She kept going.
17. She said the last word.
18. Then she sat down.
19. . It was my turn.
20. The same voice came out.
21. It was a crippled animal.
22. The animal was running on broken legs.
23. You could hear the splinter in my voice.
24. It was like bones rubbing jagged against each other.
25. I was loud, though.
26. I was glad I didn't whisper.
27. There was one little girl.
28. The girl whispered.

I found d recite : lesson

Do you recall, like Maxine Hong Kingston, a school experience where you felt embarrassed to speak up? Create the scene and situation for the reader. What did you learn from it?

178 Unit 5
Z> From A Summer Life, by Gary Soto
Growing up Hispanic in California provided Gary Soto with much to write about as an adult. The short personal narratives in A Summer Life capture his boyhood and adolescent experiences in beautifully crafted prose. In addition to his essays, Soto also writes award-winning fiction and poetry. Here he sets off on a bike ride.
Directions Carefully read the context sentences below, listening to rhythm and pattern. Then combine sentences. Finally, compare your sen¬tences with those of other students and with Gary Soto's original text (provided by your instructor),
Context Roeding Park was five miles from home, far enough for me to act goofy and spit the shells of sunflower seeds during a hard-pedaling bike ride. A shell stuck to my cheek before the wind ripped it off 1 let the one on my forehead stay until 1 got off my bike, sweaty and tired, and walked to the pond where black kids in collarless T-shirts fished.
1. I stopped to watch them awhile.
2. I cautiously held on to my bike.
3. I was afraid one of them might throw down his pole.
4. He might pedal off with what was mine.
5. The pond was shaped like a kidney.
6. It rippled with mosquitoes.
7. It rippled with water skeeters.
8. Paper cups floated near the edges.
9* Ice cream wrappers floated near the edges.
10. I left and climbed a Sherman tank.
11. The tank was painted with gold.
12. It was also littered with paper cups.
13. It was also littered with wrappers.
14. The turret was slashed with initials.
15. The turret was slashed with dumb faces.
16. The sun was already above the trees.
17. The sun was yellow as a tooth.
18. The shadows were leaning west instead of east.

T



Recombining Practice 179
to write
capture rose. In
poetry.
rung to
)ur sen-ial text
te to act ride. A corehead re black

19. The shadows lean east when the sun goes down.
20. It was a weekday.
21. Some families were banging folding chairs.
22. The chairs were from station wagons.
23. The chairs were aluminum.
24. One man was carrying an ice chest on his shoulder.
25. A couple was smoothing an army blanket.
26. : They placed heavy objects at each corner.
27. The objects were a purse.
28. The objects were an ice chest.
29. The objects were two soft tennis shoes.
30. This was so the wind would not peel it back.
Do you remember childhood adventures as clearly as Gary Soto? Think back to one where you tested the limits that had been set for you. What did you learn from this experience?

180 Unit 5
Z> From Desert Exile: The Uprooting of a Japanese American Family, by Yoshiko Uchida
Yoshiko Uchida was a happy, successful college student in the early 1940s—on her way toward becoming an award-winning writer. But then came Pearl Harbor and the federal government's decision to move 110,000 persons of Japanese ancestry into detention camps, without charges or trial. Yoshiko Uchida was part of the herd.
Directions Carefully read the context sentences below, listening to rhythm and pattern. Then combine sentences. Finally, compare your sen¬tences with those of other students and with Yoshiko Uchida's original text (provided by your instructor).
Context Barrack 16 was not a barrack at all, but a long stable raised a few feet off the ground with a broad ramp the horses had used to reach their stalls. Each stall was now numbered and ours was number 40. That the stalls should have been called "apartments" was a euphemism so ludicrous it was comical
1. We reached stall number 40.
2. We pushed open the narrow door.
3. We looked uneasily into the vacant darkness.
4. The stall was about ten by twenty feet.
5. It was empty except for three Army cots.
6. The cots were folded.
7. The cots were lying on the floor.
8. Dust covered the linoleum.
9. Dirt covered the linoleum.

10. Wood shavings covered the linoleum.
11. The linoleum had been laid over boards.
12. The boards were covered with manure.
13. The smell of horses hung in the air.
14. The corpses of many insects still clung to the walls.
15. The corpses were whitened.

T

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0,000 r trial.
mg to ir sen-il text

Recombining Practice 181
16. The walls had been hastily white-washed.
17. High on either side of the entrance were two windows.
18. The windows were small.
19. They were our only source of daylight.
20. The stall was divided into sections by Dutch doors.
21. The doors were worn down by teeth marks.
22. Each stall was separated from the adjoining one.
23. The separation was only by rough partitions.
24. The partitions stopped a foot short of the roof.
25. The roof was sloping.
26. That space deprived us of all but visual privacy.
27. It was perhaps a good source of ventilation for horses.
28. We couldn't even be sure of visual privacy.
29. There were crevices in the dividing walls.
30. There were knotholes in the dividing walls.
Have you ever had to live in a terrible place? One way to gain power over such memories—to put them behind you—is through writing. Describe the place that you disliked so much.



a few stalls, should ical.

O From Growing Up, by Russell Baker

In 1983, Russell Baker won the Pulitzer prize for biography. With many years of solid experience as a journalist, Baker writes in a clear, direct style, without indulging in self-pity, about growing up poor. Here he describes his mother's positive efforts to make Christmas memorable and joyous, even on a welfare budget.
Directions Carefully read the context sentences below, listening to rhythm and pattern. Then combine sentences. Finally, compare your sen¬tences with those of other students and with Russell Baker's original text (provided by your instructor).

182 Unit 5
Context Christmas was the one occasion on which my mother surrendered to unabashed sentimentality. A week beforehand she always concocted homemade root beer, sealed it in canning jars, and stored it in the bathroom for the yeast to ferment. Now and then, sitting in the adjoining kitchen, we heard a loud thump from the bathroom and knew that one of the jars had exploded, but she always made enough to allow for breakage.
1. She took girlish delight.
2. Her delight was in keeping gifts hidden.
3. The gifts were brightly wrapped.
4. They were hidden in closets.
5. She spent Christmas Eve in frenzies of baking.
6. She baked cakes.
7. She baked pies.
8. She baked gingerbread cookies.
9. They were cut and decorated.
10, They looked like miniature brown pine trees.
11. They looked like miniature brown Santa Clauses.


ndeted emode last to thump ilivays

Recombining Practice 183
12. She took Doris and me to the street comer.
13. This was in the afternoon.
14. There trees were piled high.
15. She searched through them.
16. She found one that satisfied our taste.
17. Our taste was for symmetry.
18. Our taste was for fullness.
19. It was my job to set the tree up in the parlor.
20. It was Doris's job to set the tree up in the parlor.
21. We were to weight it down with ornaments.
22. We were to weight it down with lights.
23. We were to weight it down with silver icicles.
24. She prepared Christmas Eve dinner.
25. This was a ritual meal.
26. Its centerpiece was oysters.
27. She disliked oysters.
28. She always ate them on Christmas Eve.
29. Oysters were the centerpiece of the traditional supper.
30. The supper was for Christmas Eve.
31. She remembered it from her girlhood.
32. Her girlhood was in Virginia.
33. She served them.
34. She perpetuated the customs of Papa's household.

invitation Celebrations and rituals—like Christmas, Yom Kip-pur, birthdays, Thanksgiving—probably stand out in your mind. Describe one of these with the clarity you see in Russell Baker's writing.
Z> From An American Childhood, by Annie Dillard
As a kid in Pittsburgh, Annie Dillard was curious about almost everything —geography, birds and rocks and insects, drawing. "Things snagged me," she writes. She visited museums, read voraciously, and observed the world around here. Watching a Polyphemus moth, for example, made a searing impression on her.

184 Unit 5
Directions Carefully read the context sentences below, listening to rhythm and pattern. Then combine sentences. Finally, compare your sen-tences with those of other students and with Annie Dillard's original text (provided by your instructor).
Context The mason jar sat on the teacher's desk; the big moth emerged inside it. The moth had clawed a hole in its hot cocoon and crawled out, as if agonizingly, over the course of an hour, one kg at a time; we children watched around the desk, transfixed. After it emerged, the wet, mashed thing turned around walking on the jar's green bottom, then painstakingly climbed the twig with which the jar was furnished.
1. The moth was there at the twig's top.
2. The moth shook its clumps of wings.
3. The wings were sodden.
4. It spread those wings.
5. The wings were beautiful.
6. Blood would fill their veins.
7. The birth fluids would harden.
8. The birth fluids were on the wings' frail sheets.
9. Hardening would make them tough as sails.

10. But the moth could not spread its wings at all.
11. The jar was too small.
12. The wings could not fill.
13. They hardened.
14. They were still crumpled from the cocoon.
A smaller moth could have spread its wings to their utmost in that mason jar, but the Polyphemus moth was big.
15. Its gold furred body was almost as big as a mouse.
16. Its wings would have extended six inches.
17. Its wings were brown, yellow, pink, and blue.
18. The extension was tip to tip.
19. This was if there had been no mason jar.
20. It would have been as big as a wren.
21. The teacher let the creature go.
22. The creature was deformed.
23. We all left the classroom.
24. We paraded out behind the teacher.
25. Our parade was with pomp and circumstance.

Recombining Practice 185



ung to -ir seri¬al text
verged fi as i/ 'atched turned igwith

r, but


26. She bounced the moth from the jar.
27. She set it on the school's driveway.
28. The moth set out walking.
29. It could only heave the clumps.
30. The clumps were golden and wrinkly.
31. The clumps were where its wings would have been.
32. It could only crawl down the school driveway.
33. . Crawling was on its six frail legs.
34. The moth crawled down the driveway.
35. It headed toward the rest of Shadyside.
36. This was an area of fine houses.
37. This was an area of expensive apartments.
38. This was an area of fashionable shops.
Like Annie Dillard, you may have strong night-marish memories from childhood. Record such a memory as fully as you can, and discuss what it reveals about you—its personal meaning.

186 Unit 5
Z) From Strawberry Road, by Yoshimi Ishikawa
Sitting on a Los Angeles pier after immigrating from Japan to America, Yoshimi Ishikawa felt "absolutely lost." Not long after, however, he began to learn about America from "the ground up"—working as a farm laborer in California's strawberry fields. He also took courses in an American high school to learn English.
Directions Carefully read the context sentences below, listening to rhythm and pattern. Then combine sentences. Finally, compare your sen¬tences with those of other students and with Yoshimi Ishikawa's original text (provided by your instructor).
Context Speech and drama was my only final The test consisted of reciting a dramatic passage or famous political speech. Talking for five minutes in front of an audience was no easy feat—especially in English. I wanted, however, to repay the kindness of my teacher, and I worked on my speech for days. 1 had chosen John F. Kennedy's inaugural speech, but, no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't get past the third line. Whenever I tried to memorize a few more of the lines, I would forget what I had already learned. In spite of this, I prepared assiduously for the final, which would take place in the school auditorium. (From STRAWBERRY ROAD by
Yoshimi Ishikawa translated by Eve Zimmerman, published by Kodansha International Ltd. Copyright © 1991 by Yoshimi Ishikama- Reprinted by permission. All rights reserved.)
1. Americans must be able to express themselves.
2. This class was good preparation for life.
3. The basic philosophy seems simple enough.
4. Make sure others listen to you.
5. This is before you listen to them.
6. It is a key to how America was formed by people.
7. The people spoke such different languages.
8. Unity comes about much more speedily.
9. You force your way of thinking upon others.

10. You make them listen to you.
11. This is something at which Anglo-Saxons excel.
12. America makes an impression on foreigners.
13. The impression is violent.
14« This is a result not just of its high crime rate. 15. This is a result of the nature of conversation here.

Recombining Practice 187

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began orer in h high
ing to ir sen-riginaf
'eciting ront of > repay chosen )uldn}t ines, I xly for
ROAD by © 1991


16. The conversation is one-sided.
17. The power to persuade is a weapon.
18. The power to be eloquent is a weapon.
19. One needs weapons to survive in America.
20. Therefore, every high school has facilities.
21. The high schools are American.
22. The facilities are for public speaking.
23. The exam began.
24. The students got up onstage one by one.
25. They recited speeches or soliloquies.
26. These were from famous plays.
27. I felt bewitched by the power of English speech.
28. One of the students recited a speech by Hamlet.
29. The student was less bright.
30. He sounded superb.
31. Exclamations arose from the audience.
32. Our teacher was taking notes.
33. She was at the foot of the stage.
34* Finally it was my turn.
What kinds of formal or informal "tests" have you faced—in school, on the street, or at work? Describe the occasion of a particularly memorable challenge and its outcome.

Z) From I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings, by Maya Angelou
Afro-American writer Maya Angelou has authored several best-selling autobiographies and collections of poetry. She took the country by storm with her first book, which depicted her childhood memories up through high school graduation. In this excerpt, she hits the California streets with three dollars and no place to sleep.
Directions Carefully read the context sentences below, listening to rhythm and pattern. Then combine sentences. Finally, compare your sen-

188 Unit 5
fences with those of other students and with Maya Angelou's original text (provided by your instructor).
Context / spent the day wandering aimlessly through the bright streets. The noisy penny arcades with their gaggle-giggle of sailors and children were tempting, but after walking through one of them it was obvious that I could only win more chances and no money. I went to the library and used part of m;y day reading science fiction, and in its marble washroom I changed my bandage.
1. I passed a junkyard on one flat street.
2. It was littered with the carcasses of old cars.
3. The dead hulks were somehow so uninviting.
4* I decided to inspect them.


Recombining Practice 189
5. I wound my way through the discards.
6. A temporary situation sprang to mind.
7. I would find a clean or cleanish car.
8. I would spend the night in it.
9. I had the optimism of ignorance,

10. I thought something.
11. The morning was bound to bring a solution.
12. The solution would be more pleasant.
13. A gray car caught my eye.
14. It was tall-bodied.
15. It was near the fence.
16. Its seats were untorn.
17. It had no rims or wheels.
18. It sat evenly on its fenders.
19. The idea bolstered my sense of freedom.
20. The idea was sleeping in the near open.
21. I was a loose kite in a gentle wind.
22. I was floating.
23. I had only my will for an anchor.
24. I decided upon the car.
25. I got inside it.
26. I ate the tuna sandwiches.
27. I then searched the floorboards for holes.
28. Something was more alarming than the shadowed hulks.
29. The hulks were in the junkyard.
30. Something was more alarming than the night.
31. The night was quickly descending.
32. This was the fear that rats might scurry in.
33. They might eat off my nose as I slept.
34. Some cases had been recently reported in the papers.
35. My gray choice, however, seemed rat-tight.
36. I abandoned my idea of taking another walk.
37. I decided to sit steady.
38. I decided to wait for sleep.
Did you ever run away from home or challenge pa-rental authority in some dramatic way? In writing, recall the situation and how you dealt with it. What did you learn from the experience?

190 Unit 5
O From Blue Highways: A Journey into America, by William Least Heat Moon
"On the old highway maps of America," writes William Least Heat Moon, "the main routes were red and the back roads blue." After the breakup of his marriage—what he calls the "Indian Wars"—he took to the back roads in an old Ford van ("Ghost Dancing") for an around-the-country trip. The journal he kept led to a best-seller.
DlF6Ctl0nS Carefully read the context sentences below, listening to rhythm and pattern. Then combine sentences. Finally, compare your sen-tences with those of other students and with William Least Heat Moon's original text (provided by your instructor).
Context Because the Navajo prefer widely dispersed clusters of clans to village life, I'd seen nothing resembling a hamlet for seventy-five miles. But Hopi Polacca almost looked like a Western town in spite of the Indian ways here and there: next to a floral-print bedsheet on a clothesline hung a coyote skin, and beside box houses were adobe bread ovens shaped like skep beehives. The Navajo held to his hogan, the Hopi his oven. Those things persisted.
1. Three mesas were like bony fingers.
2. Three mesas reached down from larger Black Mesa.
3. They reached into the middle of Hopi land.
4. Something was true not long ago.
5. The only way onto these mesas was by handholds.
6. The handholds were in the steep rock heights.
7. The Hopi look out upon a thousand square miles.
8. This is from the tops of the mesas,
9. Second Mesa was at the heart of the reservation.

10. The heart was topographic.
11. The heart was cultural.
12. Something is traditional for Hopis.
13. Hopis prefer to live on precipices.
14* This is like the eagles they hold sacred.
15. The Hopi Cultural Center was built there.
16. It was not far from the edge of Second Mesa.

Recombining Practice 191
In the gallery were drawings of mythic figures by Hopi children who fused centuries and cultures with grotesque Mudhead Kachinas wearing large terra-cotta masks and jackolantern smilest dancing atop spaceships with Darth Voder and Artoo Deetoo.

17.
4oon, 18.
:up of 19.
roads 20.
.The 21.
22.
23.
24.
ng to 25.
r sen- 26.
oon's 27.
28.
29.
30.
ns to
Hopi 31.
32.

I ate nokquivi at the Center.
It was a good hominy stew with baked chile peppers.
I had no luck in striking up a conversation.
I drove on toward the western edge of the mesa.
Not far from the tribal garage stood small houses.
The houses were built of sandstone.
The garage was for TRIBAL VEHICLES ONLY.
Their sandstone slabs were precisely cut.
Their sandstone slabs were precisely fitted.
It was as if done by ancient Aztecs.
The Aztecs are a people related to the Hopi.
The solid houses blended with the tawny land so well.
They appeared to be part of the living rock.
All were empty.
The residents had moved to prefabs.
The residents had moved to doublewides.



, and avajo

William Least Heat Moon is a keen observer of the world around him. Describe a scene—from childhood, from your neighbor-hood, from across campus—so that your reader can see it.
D From Two-Part Invention: The Story of a Marriage, by Madeleine L 'Engle
As the award'winning author of over thirty books, Madeleine L'Engle has a writer's eye for detail, even when that detail is painful to record. In her 1988 memoir, she describes a hospital vigil, where she watches her hus-band's deteriorating health. In the crisis below, her husband suffers from a collapsed lung, with surgery imminent.

192 Unit 5
Directions Carefully read the context sentences below, listening to rhythm and pattern. Then combine sentences. Finally, compare your sen-tences with those of other students and with Madeleine L'Engle's original text (provided by your instructor).
Context The young general surgeon comes in. Amazingly, I am allowed to stay in the room, to hold Hugh's hand. It is expbined that a tube will have to be put between the ribs and into the chest so that the invasive air will be sucked out. The tube will have to stay in place until after the surgery.
1. The surgeon prepares.
2. He dons surgical gloves.
3. A nurse is with him.
4. She is to hand him the local anesthetic.
5. She is to hand him sterile fluid.
6. She is ultimately to hand him the scalpel.
7. I stand at the head of the bed.
8. There I can clasp Hugh's hand.
9. He can hold hard.

10. This is when the pain is bad.
11. He is given several shots of local anesthetic.
12. Then the surgeon takes a small scalpel.
13. The surgeon makes an incision.
14. The incision is a little over an inch long.
15. It is just above the ribs.
16. Then he tells Hugh something.
17. What is coming next is going to hurt.
18. He will hear a great whoosh of air.
19. The surgeon puts his fingers in the incision.
20. He feels for the right place.
21. Then the tube is thrust in.
22. Air does indeed whoosh out.
23. Hugh almost screams with pain.
24. But the tube is in.
25. The incision is sewn up.
26. There is a plastic tank,
27. It is hung at the side of the bed.
28. "You will sound like an aquarium," the surgeon says.
29. Hugh does sound like one.
30. He is exhausted.
31. He is in pain.

w

Recombining Practice 193

mg to ir sen-riginal

Caring for a loved one is often a deeply emotional experience. Can you recall doing this or visiting a hospital where someone was being treated? Write about the scene that moved you.



wed to e to be \d out.

O From Starting from Home: A Writer's Beginnings, by Milton Meltzer
With over seventy books to his credit—many on social issues such as poverty, slavery, and women's rights—Milton Meltzer is no stranger to writing. In his memoir, he describes experiences that shaped his life. One of these occurred just before his older brother Allan ran away from home at age 14 to work in New York City.

Directions Carefully read the context sentences below, listening to rhythm and pattern. Then combine sentences. Finally, compare your sen¬tences with those of other students and with Milton Meltzer's original text (provided by your instructor).
Context With nearly four years separating us, we [Allan and I] didn't play together or share friends. Smart-ass kid that he was, he wanted desperately to be accepted by the bigger boys in class. After school, he chose the toughest kids in the neighborhood to hang out with. They didn't care for school, so neither did he. He sassed the teachers and broke most of the rules. Suspended twice, he became the constant worry of Ma and Pa. They knew how intelligent he was, and they hoped that somehow they would be able to send their first-born to college. With that big mouth, they used to say smilingly, you can be a fine lawyer some day. . . .
1. He reached Classical.
2, It was the Worcester high school.
3» It was designed to prepare students for college.
4. Something happened in his first year there.
5. He missed class for a while.
6. He was recovering from a broken leg.

194 Unit 5
7. It was broken during a football game.
8. The game was in the neighborhood.
9. He got back to school.

10. He didn't work hard to catch up in math.
11. Mr. Howland gave him a "D warning."
12. That meant something.
13.. He had to stay in after school each day.
14. He had to study under supervision.
15. Mr. Howland came up behind him one afternoon.
16. Mr. Howland saw that Allan was reading a novel.
17. It was hidden between the pages of a math text.
18. The math text was propped up on his desk.
19. He snatched it away.
20. He said something angrily.
21. "Meltzer, you're a thief!"
22. Allan was shocked by such a charge.
23. Allan said, "What do you mean by that?"
24. The teacher made a reply.
25. "You're stealing the school's time!"
26. Allan gave Mr. Howland a shove.
27. The teacher fell over a chair.
28. Allan ran out of the room.
29. Something happened the next day.
30. He entered the school.
31. The principal was waiting for him.
32. The principal was Mr. Fenner.
33. "Get out!" he yelled.
34. "You're expelled!"
Do you recall a dramatic incident in school between a teacher and a student (perhaps you yourself)? What circumstances sur-rounded this incident? Write about this event and its meaning.
Z) From The Joy Luck Club, by Amy Tan
Chinese-American writer Amy Tan achieved wide recognition in 1989 with the publication of The Joy Luck Club, her first book. With clarity and

Recombining Practice 195
style, Tan's book depicts the lives and values of Chinese-American mothers and daughters. More broadly, it deals with the tensions between genera¬tions that concern us all.
Directions Carefully read the context sentences below, listening to rhythm and pattern. Then combine sentences. Finally, compare your sen¬tences with those of other students and with Amy Tan's original text (provided by your instructor).
Context M} mother started the San Francisco version of the joy Luck Club in 1949, two years before I was born. This was the year my mother and father left China with one stiff leather trunk filled only with fancy silk dresses. There was no time to pack anything else, my mother had explained to my father after they boarded the boat. Still his hands swam frantically between the slippery silks, looking for his cotton shirts and wool pants.
1. They arrived in San Francisco.
2. My father made her hide those shiny clothes.
3. She wore the same brown-checked Chinese dress.
4. This was until something happened.
5. The Refugee Welcome Society gave her two dresses.
6. The dresses were hand-me-downs.
7. They were all too large.
8. They were in sizes for American women.
9. The society was composed of a group of ladies.

10. The ladies were American missionaries.
11. They were white-haired.
12. They came from the First Chinese Baptist Church.
13. And my parents could not refuse their invitation.
14. The invitation was to join the church.
15. This was because of the gifts.
16. Nor could they ignore the old ladies' advice.
17. The advice was practical.
18. The advice was to improve their English.
19. The improvement was through Bible study class.
20. The class was on Wednesday nights.
21. Later the improvement was through choir practice.
22. The practice was on Saturday mornings.
23. This was how my parents met the Hsus.
24* This was how my parents met the Jongs.


196 Unit 5

25. This was how my parents met the St. Clairs.
26. My mother could sense something.
27. The women of these families also had tragedies.
28. The tragedies were unspeakable.
29. They had left the tragedies behind in China.
30. The women also had hopes. y
31. They couldn't begin to express hopes in their English.
32. Their English was fragile.
33. Or at least, my mother recognized the numbness.
34. The numbness was in these women's faces.
35. And she saw how quickly their eyes moved.
36. She told them her idea.
37. Her idea was for the Joy Luck Club.
fagitation What events are part of your family's history? Recall a story that you have been told by parents, relatives, or siblings about your family. Why is this story important to you now?

Recombining Practice 197
Z> From Et Cetera, Et Cetera: Notes of a Word-Watcher, by Lewis Thomas
Some people have narrow, specialized interests. Not Lewis Thomas. Inter-nationally known for his work as a physician and medical researcher, Thomas has also been praised for his excellent science writing. One of his recent books grows out of a lifelong love affair with language. Here he discusses animal communication.
Directions Carefully read the context sentences below, listening to rhythm and pattern. Then combine sentences. Finally, compare your sen¬tences with those of other students and with Lewis Thomas's original text (provided by your instructor).
Cont6Xt Other creatures have ways of communicating with each other, sending clear and explicit messages, but never with the subtlety and complexity of human speech. But perhaps some of the messages represent the rudiments of language; perhaps the gift of something Uke speech has been selected for in the evolution of all species and only we humans, thus far, have broken through and emerged with metaphor as our sign of triumph,
1. Dolphins make sounds.
2. The sounds seem to be messages.
3. The messages are beyond our comprehension.
4. Whales sing songs to each other.
5. Whales sing across undersea miles.
6. The songs are deep and mysterious.
7. Fireflies congregate by the millions.
8. The congregation is in tropical trees.
9* They flash together in absolute synchrony.
10. The flashing marks the species ready for mating.
11. Crickets chirp in tight rhythms.
12. Each chirp identifies family members.
13. The family members are keeping in touch.
14. Something happens when the weather chills down.
15. The male crickets chirp at a slower rate.
16. The chirping is done so predictably.

198 VnitS
17. Farmers can make guesses at the temperature change.
18. Naturalists can make guesses at the temperature change.
19. The guesses are accurate.
20. It is a comfort to know something.
21. The female's receptor apparatus accommodates.
22. The apparatus slows accordingly.
23. Sometimes the messages are sent across species lines.
24. The honeyguide is a small African bird.
25. It locates honeybee hives.
26. The hives are in forest trees.
27. It signals the exact location to human beings.
28. It signals by a specialized call.
29. The call is seemingly deliberate.
30. The human beings follow the bird.
31. The human beings then break open the hives.
32. The human beings leave behind ample supplies.
33. The supplies are for the birds' needs.

Con
Sullivi me w tussle impre. persis\

Have you ever cared for an animal with whom you shared the "rudiments of language"? Describe this animal and the type of communication, or love, that evolved between the two of you.
O From The Story of My Life, by Helen Keller
When Helen Keller was nineteen months old, she was struck down by an illness that left her deaf and blind. She languished in a dark, silent world until a remarkable teacher, Annie Sullivan, helped her begin to acquire the rudiments of language with "finger-writing." Helen Keller's story has in-spired millions of handicapped people.
Directions Carefully read the context sentences below, listening to rhythm and pattern. Then combine sentences. Finally, compare your sen¬tences with those of other students and with Helen Keller's original text (provided by your instructor).

■ J_«l -
Recombining Practice 199
Context One day, while I was playing with my new [ceramic] doll7 Miss Sullivan put my big rag doll into my lap abo, spelled "d'o44" and tried to make me understand that "d-o-M" applied to both. Earlier in the day we had had a tussle over the words "m-u-g" and "w-a-t-e-r" Miss Sullivan had tried to impress it upon me that "m-u-g" is mug and that "w^t^r" is water, but I persisted in confounding the two. . . .
1. We walked down the path to the well-house.
2. We were attracted by the fragrance of honeysuckle.
3. Honeysuckle covered the well-house.
4. Someone was drawing water.
5. My teacher placed my hand under the spout.
6. The cool stream gushed over one hand.
7. She spelled into the other the word water,
8. First she did this slowly.
9. Then she did this rapidly.

10. I stood still.
11. My whole attention was fixed upon the motions.
n you fpe of


by an world re the is in-
ng to
' sen-text

200 Unit 5
12. Her fingers made the motions.
13. Something happened suddenly.
14. I felt a misty consciousness.
15. It was like something forgotten.
16. It was a thrill of returning thought.
17. Somehow the mystery of language was revealed to me.
18. I knew something then.
19. "W-a-t-e-r" meant the wonderful cool something.
20. It was flowing over my hand.
21. The living word awakened my soul.
22. It gave my soul light.
23. It gave my soul hope.
24. It gave my soul joy.
25. It set my soul free.
26. It is true that there were still barriers.
27. The barriers could in time be swept away.
28. I left the well-house eager to learn.
29. Everything had a name.
30. Each name gave birth to a new thought,
31. We returned to the house.
32. Every object seemed to quiver with life.
33. I touched every object.
invitation Have you ever had a "breakthrough" like that experi¬enced by Helen Keller? Describe a time when you felt the joy of success, learning, or personal recognition.
O From A River Runs Through It, by Norman Maclean
Perhaps you've seen Robert Redford's film of Norman Maclean's A River Runs Through It. If so, you already know the dramatic Montana setting for the story of Norman Maclean's family and his interest in fly-fishing. The following passage records the last time that Norman fishes with his father and his brother Paul.

Recombining Practice 201
Directions Carefully read the context sentences below, listening to rhythm and pattern. Then combine sentences. Finally, compare your sen¬tences with those of other students and with Norman Maclean's original text (provided by your instructor).
Context Paul was startled for only a moment. Then he spotted Father on the bank rubbing his shoulder, and Paul laughed, shook his fist at him, backed to shore and went downstream to get out of rock range. From there he waded into the water again, but now he was far enougfx away so that we couldnt see his line or loops. He was a man with a wand in a river, and whatever happened we had to guess from what the man and the wand and the river did.
1. He waded out.
2. His big right arm swung back and forth.
3. Each circle of his arm inflated his chest.
4. Each circle was faster.
5. Each circle was higher.
6. Each circle was longer.
7. His arm became defiant.
8. His chest breasted the sky.
9* We could see no line on shore.
10. We were sure of something.
11. The air above him was singing with loops of line.
12. The loops never touched the water.
13. Each time they passed and sang.
14. They got bigger and bigger.
. 15. And we knew what was in his mind.
16. We watched the lengthening defiance of his arm.
17. He was not going to let his fly touch any water.
18. The water was close to shore.
19. The small fish were there.
20. The middle-sized fish were there.
We knew from his arm and chest that all parts of him were saying, "No small one for the last one."
21. Everything was going into one big cast.
22. The cast was for one last big fish.
23. Our angle was high on the bank.
24. My father and I could see something in the distance.

202 Unit 5
25. The wand was not going to let the fly touch the water.
26. A rock iceberg was in the middle of the river.
27. Just its tip was exposed above the water.
28. Underneath it was a big rock house.
29. It met all the residential requirements for big fish.
30. There was powerful water.
31. The water carried food to the front and back doors.
32. There was rest behind the doors.
33. There was shade behind the doors.
My father said, "There has to be a big one out there."
Recall a vivid scene from your personal history—one that captures a memory that you value. Narrate what happens, and tell why this scene is important to you.
D From Lakota Woman, by Mary Crow Dog and Richard Erdoes
"I am a woman of the Red Nation, a Sioux woman," writes Mary Crow Dog, who grew up fatherless on the Rosebud Reservation in South Dakota, in a one-room cabin without electricity or running water. At an early age she learned about whippings at school, alcohol, racism, and rape. And yet there were also positive influences.
Directions Carefully read the context sentences below, listening to rhythm and pattern. Then combine sentences. Finally, compare your sen¬tences with those of other students and with Mary Crow Dog's original text (provided by your instructor).
Context One woman, Elsie Flood, a niece of Grandma's, had a big influence upon me. She was a turtle woman, a strong, self-reliant person, because a turtle stands for strength, resolution, and long life. A turtle heart beats and beats for days, long after the turtle itself is dead. It keeps on beating all by itself. In

Recombining Practice 203
traditional families a beaded charm in the shape of a turtle is fastened to a newborn child's cradle. The baby's navel cord is put inside this turtle charmt which i$ believed to protect the infant from harm and bad spirits. The charm is also supposed to make the child live to a great old age. A turtle is a strength of mind, a communication with the thunder.

—one II why


1. I loved to visit Aunt Elsie.
2. This was to listen to her stories.
3. She looked like Grandma.
4. Grandma had high cheekbones.
5. She had a voice like water.
6. The water was bubbling.
7. Her talking was with a deep sound.
8. Her talking was with a throaty sound.
9. And she talked fast.

10. She mixed Indian and English together.
11. I had to pay strict attention.
12. I wanted to understand what she told me.
13. She always paid her bills.
14. She earned a living by her arts and crafts.
15. This was her beautiful work with beads,
16. This was her beautiful work with porcupine quills.
17. This is what she called her "Indian novelties."
18. She was also a medicine woman.




Crow ikota, ly age id yet
ng to : sen-1 text
a big cause beats If In

:*^0$&;},'^

204 Unit 5
19. She was an old-time woman.
20. She was carrying her pack on her back.
21. She would not let a man carry her burden.
22. She could not let a younger woman carry her burden.
23. She carried it herself.
24. She did not ask for help from anybody.
25.. She did not accept help from anybody.
26. She was proud of her turtle strength.
27. She used turtles as her protection.
Wherever she went, she always had some little live turtles with her and all kinds of things made out of tortoiseshell little charms and boxes.
28. She had a little place in Martin.
29. It was halfway between Rosebud and Pine Ridge.
30. There she lived alone.
31. She was very independent.
32. She was always glad to have me visit her.
33. Once she came to our home.
34. She was trudging along as usual.
35. She had the heavy pack on her back.
36. She had two shopping bags.
37. They were full of herbs and strange things.
38. She also brought a present for me.
39. The present was two turtles.
40. They were tiny and very lively.
41. She had painted Indian designs.
42. The designs were on their shells and bottoms.
43. She communicated with them by name.
44. One she called "Come."
45. The other she called "Go."
46. They always waddled over to her.
47. She called to them to get their food.
48. She had a special kind of feed for them.
49. She would leave me whole bags of it.
50. These small twin turtles stayed tiny.
51. They never grew.
52. One day the white principal's son came over.
53. He smashed them.
54. He simply stomped them to death.
55. My aunt heard it.
56. She said that this was an evil sign for her.

Recombining Practice 205



Is there an adult, like Aunt Elsie, who had a positive influence on your development as a child? Describe that person and how he or she helped shape your character.

inds of

Z> From Papa, My Father, by Leo Buscaglia

A celebrated teacher, writer, and public speaker, Leo Buscaglia is well known for his views about love. Many of his lessons came from memorable experiences with his father, an Italian immigrant with a fifth-grade educa¬tion. In this richly narrated excerpt, Buscaglia describes the work of making wine with his father.
Directions Carefully read the context sentences below, listening to rhythm and pattern. Then combine sentences. Finally, compare your sen¬tences with those of other students and with Leo Buscaglia's original text (provided by your instructor).
Context When I was growing up, we had many. festivities in our home. None, except Christmas and Easter, topped the one night a year that we made new wine. The anticipation and preparation began in July and August, long before the eventful September evening when the truckload of grapes was delivered. B;y then Papa had made several visits to his friends—grape growers in Cu-camonga, about forty miles from our home—to observe the progress of his grapes. Hehadspent hours scouring the barrels in which wine would be made and stored, and applying antirust varnish on every visible metal part of the wine-making equipment. The fermenting vat had been filled with water to swell the wood.
1. Something happened on the appointed evening.
2. The truck would arrive after nightfalls
3. It was brimming with small Cabernet grapes.
4. They were tough-skinned.
5. They were sweet-smelling.

-~*m
206 Unit 5




The boxes of grapes were hand-carried.
7. It was about two hundred feet to the garage.
8. A giant empty vat awaited there.
9. A crusher was positioned on top of the vat.

10. The crusher was hand-powered.
11. Its positioning was precarious.
12. It was ready to grind noisily into the night.
13. Thousands of grapes were poured into it.
14. . It was an all-male operation.
15. The operation included Papa.
16. The operation included his relatives.
17. The operation included his friends.
18. They were dressed in nightshirts.
19. Their bodies glistened with perspiration.
20. They took turns cranking the crusher handle.
21. My job was to stack the crates out of the way.
22. The crates were empty.
23. The stacking was neat.

partfc parer expla

Recombining Practice 207
This was a prelude to what for me was the most exciting part of the evening.
24. The grapes had been mashed.
25. The empty boxes were stacked.
26. It was time for us to remove our shoes.
27. It was time for us to remove our socks.
28. It was time for us to remove our pants.
29. It was time to slip into the moisture.
30. The moisture was cool and dark.
31. This was the traditional grape stomping.
32. This was done to break up the skins.
33. I couldn't have cared less why it was necessary.
34* It was a sensual experience for me.
35. It was unlike any other experience.
36. I felt the grape residue.
37. The residue gushed between my toes.
38. I watched the new wine.
39. It turned my legs the color of Cabernet Sauvignon.
40. The color was rich and deep.
You may not have stomped grapes, but perhaps you participated in other family rituals with your father, your mother, grand¬parents, or siblings. Describe the details of a ritual from your family, and explain its present significance as a memory.


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wil 1 Inn cor wri sch ger kn< Na ing Appendix A Sentence Combining and Writing Process This book's Introduction and unit activities have already introduced you to sentence combining (SC)—a hands-on approach for improving your sentence-making skills. The effectiveness of SC has been demonstrated in many research studies. Equally important, many thousands of students have used SC to improve their sentence fluency and to write better papers. To transfer improved skill in sentence construction to your real writing, you need to understand how writing works. After all, writing is a made thing—a product of planning and scribbling and tinkering that results from what many teachers call "the writing process." While no two people follow exactly the same process, it seems clear that successful writers use a variety of productive routines. Once you understand some of these strategies and begin using the ones that make sense to you, your sentence-combining skills will take root. This discussion of writing process has three aims. First, we'll consider the Inner Game and Outer Game of writing so that you have background for considering the processes many writers use. Then we'll examine a model of writing process to see how it might assist you with many writing tasks in school and business. Finally, we'll look at several useful strategies for generating ideas—in other words, finding something to say when you don't know what to say. INNER GAME, OUTER GAME Name your sport of choice—soccer, basketball, skiing, tennis, skateboard' ing, hockey, surfing, racquetball—whatever you enjoy. Now picture your- 210 Appendix A self on the court or playing field or riding a wave crest, in the middle of the action. A moment's reflection will help you realize that two games occur simul-taneously in any of these settings. One game is the physical action itself; the other is the psychological game that goes on inside your head. Thus, the Outer Game refers to the tennis ball zinging back and forth across the net; the Inner Game refers to the "coaching" you give yourself and to the strategies you use to keep the ball in play and score points. Similarly, we can think of writing as an event with two simultaneous games. Right now, for example, my Outer Game is being played on an IBM PS/2 Notebook computer with a color monitor. More specifically, these words are being written on a Superbowl Sunday evening as pianist Murray Perahia plays a Mozart piano sonata. My Inner Game has been played over three days of reading, note taking, and planning. I used more Inner Game strategy tonight when I finally decided to write this material in three parts—general issues first, specific matters later. Your Outer Game occurs whenever you transcribe your thoughts into written words. If you possess a strong set of Outer Game skills, you probably don't think about how to spell basic words correctly, punctuate in conven¬tional ways, or write reasonably coherent sentences. On the other hand, if your Outer Game skills need work, SC practice can help. Why? Because SC practice improves your Outer Game fluency. And by helping you integrate ideas smoothly and maturely at a sentence level, SC practice "frees up" mental energy for Inner Game strategy. I used one such Inner Game move just a few moments ago. When I found myself stuck in developing this section, I stopped and paused to reread from the heading on down. I imagined myself in your shoes—reading these words for the first time, trying to figure them out. When I reached the bottom of this section—about two paragraphs down—I realized that all of this might make more sense if I rearranged the paragraphs. So that's what I did. Then I tinkered with the wording to make the flow of thought as seamless as possible. Another Inner Game move is occurring right now. As I write, trying to explain the interaction of Outer Game and Inner Game, I find myself pausing to wonder whether this will make any sense to you. Please under-stand that it's not your reading ability I doubt; rather, it's my ability to make these ideas clear that causes me to worry. Although I know from years of writing experience that I cannot give in to such self-doubts, I still have to coach myself to "just get the words down" so that I can work with them tome who In you i want feel. of us, work A SH It's F mov< writi outli: proa GEN Nc sense any a Sentence Combining and Writing Process 211 ; of the simul-elf; the us, the lie net; to the aneous in IBM , these vlurray ;d over Game three ts into obably >nven-and, if JseSC :egrate es up"
found d from these td the : all of what I ght as
ing to myself mder-make :ars of ive to them

tomorrow. Just now, for example, I pictured my mentor, Donald Murray, who reminded me to "lower my standards."
In describing some of my planning and self-coaching, I am trying to help you understand the Inner Game of writing—at least as I understand it. I want you to see that the frustrations you feel as a writer are the same ones I feel. The truth of the matter is really quite simple: Writing is hard work for all of us, not just for you. The whole idea of the Inner Game is to find ways of working "smarter," not harder.
A "SHAPING UP, SHIPPING OUT" MODEL
It's possible to think of the Inner Game of writing as a series of strategic moves that flow from and into one another. Let's look at one such model of writing process to see whether it might hold interest for you. Cycle 1 outlines a process for "shaping up" a draft of writing; cycle 2 focuses on the process of working with a draft so that it can be "shipped out."
> DRAFTING
GENERATING
REVISING
> EDITING
PUBLISHING
Notice the forward-pointing arrows in the model. It probably makes sense to you that generating ideas (say, in a list) would reasonably precede any attempt at drafting a paper.- By the same token, drafting would logically

212 Appendix A

precede any effort at revising ideas, just as editing would come before publishing.
What you may be puzzled about are arrows that point back toward earlier activities. For example, one arrow points from revising toward generating, and another one points from publishing toward revising. What do these "recursive" (backward-pointing) arrows suggest?
In Cycle 1 the recursive arrow indicates what most writers know from personal experience—that the process of revising the content of a paper or the organization of ideas often stimulates a new direction or angle for writing. In other words, the act of getting ideas down—then tinkering with them—can trigger a whole new cycle of generating and drafting activity. This recursive loop has often been compared to a process of discovery, of finding out "what you didn't know you knew."
A similar recursive loop occurs in Cycle 2—from publishing to revising to generating. But how can this be? Once a piece of writing is published, isn't the writer finished with it? Perhaps not. For example, this edition of Sentence Combining grows out of work that was published twenty years ago. The original book contained no discussion of the inner and outer games of writing; also absent was any mention of a "shaping up, shipping out" model to describe the writing process. The fact that I'm still trying to get this book right leads me to agree with the poet Paul Valery—that writing is "never finished, only abandoned."
Generating techniques include, among others, list making, clustering, sketching, reading and taking notes, asking and answering questions, free-writing, and outlining. Such writing—often in words and phrases, not sentences—is sometimes called a "zero draft," the stage before a first draft. Many writers find that talking through their ideas with others helps prepare them for drafting.
In drafting a paper, you establish an initial shape and a direction for your writing. Generally, it's a good idea to work relatively fast when developing a first draft, focusing mainly on content (what you want to say). After a first draft is finished, try setting it aside for a day or two and then coming back to it for a more critical second look. Typically, your teacher or employer never sees this draft; instead, it provides the raw material that you use for revising.
As the model above indicates, revising lies at the heart of the writing process. During revision, your emphasis is still on content (getting the ideas right), but organization and focus are also high priorities. Often you'll ask yourself basic questions: What's my message? Where is this going? How can 1 organize more clearly? In all likelihood, you'll rearrange paragraphs, add

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Sentence Combining and Writing Process 213
points of emphasis or detail, and begin to delete irrelevant or distracting material. It's usually quite helpful at this stage to have other students (or your instructor) read your draft and offer constructive response.
While editing may occur at any stage of the writing process, it makes most sense toward the end—when content, organization, and focus are firmly established. Editing refers to decisions about word choice and phrasing as well as to the process of "cleaning up" any errors in spelling, punctuation, and usage. It may interest you to know that unskilled student writers tend to be preoccupied with editing at the early stages of writing. The problem with premature editing is that it blocks the writer's attention to the larger issues of content and structure.
Publishing may take many forms. Distributing an updated resume is a form of publishing. So is handing in a paper for a term project. So is presenting a portfolio of your best pieces of writing. Remember that you can publish your work among family and friends simply by sharing it with them. Whenever you get a response from another human being about your written words, you have published something,



-ring, free-, not draft. epare
your Dping a. first .ck to never 'ising. ■iting ideas .1 ask can 1
add

Let's turn now from a general discussion of writing process to seven specific strategies you can use to generate ideas. These strategies are tools for thinking.. Find the ones that work for you, and make them part of your writing routine.
Try practicing these approaches in connection with sentence combining. When you find a writing Invitation that appeals to you, turn to this section and use a new generating strategy. Over time, you'll discover the techniques that work best in your personal writing process. The aim of these activities is to help you relax and work productively.
Talking Have you ever "unloaded" your problems on a close friend? Most of us remember such close encounters because they help us to think through an issue or decision. Generally, we don't ask the friend to solve our problem; after all, that's a matter of personal responsibility. We simply ask the friend to listen—to hear us out as we try to talk our way through it.

214 Appendix A
In much the same way, talking can help you solve problems in writing. As you explain your writing difficulty, your listener probably nods, smiles, grunts, and frowns; occasionally, he or she may ask questions, look puzzled, or offer suggestions. Working in this way can help you clarify what you want to say as well as how it might be said. Why? Because you've rehearsed your ideas before writing them!
Listing Perhaps you're the type of person who makes a list before shopping or beginning an afternoon of errands. The list helps you use time well because it gets you organized. You may also have discovered how helpful a list can be in planning your study time. By budgeting your time and setting priorities, you take control of your academic life.
For many writers, too, a list serves as a memory aid, one that's quick, efficient, and easy to use. Often you can list writing ideas in a few minutes or less. Such a list is easy to rearrange by drawing arrows or by recopying; also, you can make the list more detailed by adding categories. Here, for example, is the list 1 used when writing this section.
Generating Strategies
• Talking to others
• Making lists
• Clustering technique
• Different kinds of sketches,
maps, time lines, doodles
• Freewriting
• Creating questions
• Outlining
Generally speaking, listing works well when you're familiar with your material, and you simply need a way to get yourself moving. For example, when you are writing an essay exam, the simple list is a powerful tool for giving yourself a sense of direction.
Clustering You saw above that the list is straightforward and orderly. A "cluster," on the other hand, works differently. Clustering taps visual imagery, word associations, and memory in a playful, personal way. For this reason, clustering is a strategy you'll want to try as you work with SC Invitations.
Here's a sample cluster that uses "Generating Strategies" as its nucleus:

Sentence Combining and Writing Process 215

Talking

problems rehearsal

Freewriting
scribbling
discovery focused freewrite



Listing

errands

Clustering
right brain



organization
writing exams

memory
imagery words

Generating Strategies

formats
Outlining
large projects

time lines, etc.
Sketching
like clustering
talking to self
Questioning
note cards

216 Appendix A
The key to clustering is allowing yourself the freedom to be creative. First
of all, simply relax and put your topic in the center of a blank page. Let your sk
mind make its associations in any way it chooses. Write down key words or I '7
phrases as they come, without excluding anything. Use lines to connect | co
related words and ideas; have fun with the process. I
Over a period of five minutes or so, watch the cluster emerge on your j
notepad. As it unfolds, you will sometimes feel a sudden "click" of under-
standing or a "flash" of insight. Once you experience this sudden sense of I ■"'
how to write your paper, you're ready to start drafting. ! ln
i th
or

CG
Sketching Try making sketches as a way of generating writing ideas.
For example, if you're trying to recall events from your childhood for a yo
personal essay, you can sketch a simple map of your neighborhood or home. pa
The process of drawing a map will stimulate many details in your mind. You [ yo
can then use the sketch to talk through important memories with a writing !
partner. Following such a two-step process of prewriting, you'll find yourself i id.
ready to draft a strong, interesting memoir. ex
Another type of sketch is the time line. Let's say, for example, that dr
you've sketched a map and talked with a writing partner as described above. , be
Now you might use a personal time line to outline a series of events; this afc
would help you begin writing.
September Turning Point *-*
wi
to
fe
work site home from school orchard qu

ca
clearing stumps grandpa with bad news reality
hi
qt
pa
he
Other types of sketches include stick figures. For example, if you're ca
reading a short story, you might sketch key figures as you understand them. w< The henpecked husband would be a small figure; the villain would have an evil smile or devil's horns; the wide-eyed free spirit would have hair flowing O in the wind. As you get ready to write a critical analysis, these sketches will wi cue your memories of the story. bi Sentence Combining and Writing Process 217 Another type of sketch is the diagram or model. An example of such a sketch is the two-cycle model of writing process that I used in the section "A 'Shaping Up, Shipping Out' Model." By using a sketch to outline a complex process, I tried to make the process easier to understand. FreeWliting Try the process of nonstop freewriting when you're hav¬ing trouble with a writing assignment. The aim with this technique is to get the words flowing. Don't worry about how your writing relates to the topic or assignment. Just write—thinking "aloud" on paper, As your fingers scribble across a notepad or dance nonstop over a computer keyboard, you begin to voice your frustration and think about why you're stuck. The idea, remember, is to let the words flow, without any pause. What happens typically is that you begin to think on paper, not in your head. Words lead to sentences, which lead to ideas. The process of nonstop freewriting sometimes triggers a release of blocked ideas. This is an exciting event, one that you will surely enjoy once you experience it. Many writers then use focused freewriting as a second step to drafting. Choose a word, phrase, or idea from the first writing as a spring¬board for the second. Before you know it, you have material that you'll be able to incorporate into your paper. Questioning Sometimes, because we're so focused on the problems of writing, we overlook the obvious: What are the reader's questions about my topic? Making a list of questions from the reader's viewpoint provides a fresh way to approach the challenge of writing. Also, once you have a list of questions, you can begin to work on organizing your paper effectively. One strategy you might try for longer projects is to put questions on note cards. These cards can serve as organizers for your library research, face-to-face interviews, or other methods of gathering information. Of course, questions can easily be converted into topic sentences that lead into paragraphs. Also, you might try leaving a question or two as section headings or paragraph openers. While the device of the rhetorical question can become tired if you overuse it, don't hesitate to give it a try. It often works extremely well. The key point about questions is that they serve as intellectual tools. Once you have questions in mind, your background reading and your writing have purpose. In other words, questions not only help your writing but also give focus to your thinking. 218 Appendix A Outlining Many teachers and students think of outlining as old- fashioned, and in a way it is. However, when you're faced with a research ou paper, proposal, or report, you may want to use an outlining strategy of wr some kind. You'll prepare an outline for basically the same reason that you ou carry a road map when traveling cross-country: you don't want to get lost ha somewhere along the way. Also, once you have a plan to work from, you foi can concentrate on what you're saying, not whether it's organized. Of course, a good outline is not a straitjacket. In the process of drafting and developing your paper, you may have new insights that you want to incorporate. That's to be expected, not avoided. As noted above, an outline is like a road map. If you want to take some side roads along the journey, you can use the outline to find your way back to the main highway. The note-card technique described under "Questioning" above can help you develop a topic outline. Simply put key words or phrases on separate note cards; then spread the cards out on a large surface, and sort them into categories. Deal with the categories one by one, arranging the cards into sequences. Finally, transfer your working plan from the note cards into some sort of outline. Here's a topic outline for the material on outlining: Outlining A. Old-fashioned but useful for long documents B. Similar to a road map; not a straitjacket C. Note-card technique to develop an outline 1. Use key words and phrases—separate cards 2. Put in categories—then sequence 3. Create an outline from cards And here's a simple "semantic web"—a different sort of outline that expresses the same ideas as the one above: Outlining Why use it? How to use it? long documents use key words and phrases road-map analogy on note cards not a straitjacket categorize and sequence create outline from cards i old-irch y of you lost you Sentence Combining and Writing Process 219 Remember that there's no magic in the form of an outline—that an outline is simply a tool for writing. However, if you're the type of person who likes clear direction before undertaking a task, you may find that an outline reduces your fear of writing. In other words, with an outline in hand, you may be surprised by the sense of relaxation you feel. That's good for your attitude—and also your writing. ting t to an the /ay. lelp rate nto nto nto lat ac th i •". Tl Lit to Pa ap re] yo Appendix B Sentence and Paragraph Strategies Perhaps you've tried some SC exercises, and you're now ready for some advice on sentence and paragraph strategies. If so, this is the material you've been looking for. You can find additional minilessons on specific grammar and punctuation topics in a companion book—A Writer's Toolbox (forthcoming from McGraw-Hill). In this section we'll consider five minilessons of writing strategy. Here's the sequence: Parallelism in Sentences Variety in Sentences Choosing Effective Sentences Paragraph Organization Paragraph Packaging These lessons provide introductions to important writing topics. If you'd like additional information, check with your instructor, who can refer you to other materials or provide further in-class examples to answer your questions. PARALLELISM IN SENTENCES Parallel lines run side by side—like a railroad track. This same idea can be applied to sentences. With parallel (or balanced) construction, you use repeated phrases or sentence patterns. As long as you repeat the pattern, you don't "derail" your reader. 222 Appendix B Shown below in boldface type is an example of balanced prepositional phrases; Senior citizens are up at the crack of dawn. Senior citizens are without other places to go. Senior citizens head for their local hangout. v Up at the crack of dawn and without other places to go, senior citizens head for their local hangout. Let's add an appositive phrase to the sentence above, one that describes the local hangout: Senior citizens—up at the crack of dawn, without other places to go—head for their local hangout, a fast-food restaurant. Here you see parallel noun phrases—their local hangout and a fast-food restaurant. Of course, parallelism can involve more than a pair of phrases or sen-tences. Shown below are two examples in which noun phrases occur in a series. The men come dressed in a standard uniform—baseball cap, nylon windbreaker, checkered pants, and running shoes, OR The widows wear knit sweaters, blue or pink polyester pants, and sturdy, old-fashioned shoes. Remember, any sort of series that repeats a grammatical element is called a "balanced" structure—or "parallelism" for short. Let's now look at another example of parallelism, this time in verb phrases with verb forms called "participles." They arrive rain or shine. They look for a newspaper. They look for a cup of coffee. They hope for a friendly smile v They arrive rain or shine, looking for a newspaper and a cup of coffee and hoping for a friendly smile. Sentence and Paragraph Strategies 223 The parallel verb phrases begin with looking and hoping. Nested within the first phrase is more parallelism {a newspaper and a cup of coffee). These latter two phrases are once again noun phrases. So far, we've considered simple examples of balanced (or parallel) struc¬ture. As you might guess, parallelism can get more interesting and compli¬cated. Shown below is a sentence with two main clauses balanced against each other; within each clause are parallel phrases* Some seniors are physically sound. They are mentally alert. They are happily adjusted to retirement. Other seniors are financially strapped. They are emotionally starved. v Some seniors are physically sound, mentally alert, and happily ad-justed to retirement; others, however, are financially strapped and emotionally starved. In this example, you see parallelism both at the clause level and at the level of repeated phrases (in boldface). What about problems with parallelism? One common problem results from trying to use two different types of phrases—say a noun phrase and a verb phrase—in parallel fashion. Here's an example of such a problem sentence (marked with an asterisk): *Discussions about old age and sharing a cup of coffee help seniors cope with their loneliness. To fix this sentence, either make both of the boldfaced items noun phrases or make both of them verb phrases: Discussions about old age and a shared cup of coffee help seniors cope with their loneliness. OR Seniors cope with their loneliness by discussing old age and sharing a cup of coffee. Both sentences above solve the problem. The first uses noun phrases, while the second uses verb phrases. 224 Appendix B Parallelism problems can occur when you're in a hurry—or when you haven't proofread carefully. Let's see if you can spot what's wrong with the sentence below and determine how it might be fixed. *The seniors may vary in age, how much income, and what race they are, yet their social needs are similar. The problem results from three different types of phrases being used togeth¬er. To fix this sentence, why not try this? The seniors may vary in age, in income, and in race, yet their social needs are similar. OR Although their ages, incomes, and races may vary, their social needs are similar. Thus, the secret of good parallel structure is to set up a pattern, stick with it, and read your words aloud. Now that you understand parallelism, read the section "Variety in Sentences." VARIETY IN SENTENCES What is it they say about variety? That it adds "spice" to life? That "different is good"? What's true for life (and fast food) is no less true for sentences. Variety matters, not just for its own sake but for the emphasis it adds to ideas. To explore sentence variety, let's work with the next cluster of sen-tences. While these sentences won't lead to any literary masterpiece, we can have fun using them to learn. Alice seemed callous. She was at home in her palace. Her palace was near Dallas. She lived without malice. As you combine this cluster, you may use but to create a "balanced" sentence, one with two halves: Alice seemed callous in her Dallas palace, but she lived without malice. Sentence and Paragraph Strategies 225 y°u Or you may use although to make the first half of the sentence depend on the e second half: they eth->cial
Although Alice seemed callous in her Dallas palace, she lived without malice.
Or you may reverse the wording of the first half and make the second half almost separate from the first:
In her Dallas palace, Alice seemed callous; however, she lived with-out malice.
Or you may disregard connectors altogether and use a different approach to
-eds combining:
Seemingly callous in her Dallas palace, Alice lived without malice.
vith
■ead As you whisper the four sentences above, what you probably notice is
their variety—in structure and rhythm. In a way, each sentence has a
unique "voice." Each conveys basically the same message, but it does so in
its own way. This, in a nutshell, is what we mean by sentence variety,
* Beneath the surface of any written sentences are many others, just
waiting to be discovered and considered. It's you who makes the decisions
^at about which sentences to keep and which to reject. To do this, you read the
*or context of surrounding sentences, listening to the flow of meaning. Then,
s lt trusting your instincts, you begin to rearrange, to add, and to trim back
where necessary.
en' Let's say, for example, that you wanted the "Alice" sentences to empha-
we size her appearance of callousness, not her lack of malice. To accomplish
this, you'd work with structure once again, putting the key idea in the main
sentence.
Alice, who lived without malice in a Dallas palace, seemed callous.
OR Living in a Dallas palace without malice, Alice seemed callous.
OR
:d" A Dallas palace is where Alice lived without malice; nevertheless, she
seemed callous.
OR
m Although Alice's life in a Dallas palace was without malice, she
seemed callous.

226 Appendix B
Notice again: Each sentence "says" the same thing as the others, but each does so in a unique way. Notice, too, that the sentences all have different opening words.
Looking at opening words in your own writing will help you determine whether you have reasonable sentence variety. Of course, if all sentences begin with the same words—or almost the same ones—it's a safe bet that you can revise with an eye (and ear) toward varied sentences. The goal, always, is communication that engages your reader and handles your subject effectively; sentence variety is simply a tool to accomplish that goal.
How else can sentence variety be achieved? You can experiment with punctuation, such as a pair of dashes:
Alice seemed callous—at home in her Dallas palace—yet she lived without malice.
Or you can reverse the regular word order, again using punctuation:
At home, in her Dallas palace, lived Alice—seemingly callous, but without malice.
Or you can try it as a sentence opener:
It was without malice, in her Dallas palace, that seemingly callous Alice lived.
Or you can see what happens with what:
What seemed callous, despite her absence of malice, was Alice's life in a Dallas palace.
Or you can combine sentences as simply as possible:
Seemingly callous, Alice lived without malice in her Dallas palace.
The last sentence above—the short one—deserves further comment. As you explore options through sentence combining, you may conclude that "long is good" and "short is bad." Nothing could be further from the truth. Why? Because short sentences are probably your most powerful tool for achieving variety!

Sentence and Paragraph Strategies 227
Variety in sentences comes naturally as you try new structures, read with care, and—above all—listen to what you have written. Read "Choosing Effective Sentences" for more on variety.
CHOOSING EFFECTIVE SENTENCES
How do you know which sentences to choose? To answer that question, let's combine clusters, make some choices, and see the results in paragraph form. Our tongue-in-cheek topic? "Surviving School"! Study the X and Y sentences below for each cluster.
1.1 Gaining ah extension is not easy.
1*2 The extension is for a term paper.
1.3 A formula works for some students.
1.4 The formula is time-tested.

IX
Gaining an extension is not easy for a term paper, but a time-tested for¬mula works for some students.

1Y
Although gaining an extension for a term paper is not easy, a time-tested formula works for some students.

Sentence IX, as written, is confusing and ungrammatical B;y contrast lY is much clearer and easier to follow.
2.1 The student's approach should be shuffling.
2.2 The student's approach should be deferential.
2.3 The approach is to the instructor.
2.4 It should not be arrogant.
2.5 It should not be demanding.

2X
The student's approach to the in-structor should be shuffling and deferential, not arrogant or de-manding.

2Y
The approach of the student to the instructor should not be so much arrogant or demanding as shuffling and deferential.

Sentence 2X is five words shorter and easier to read than 2Y. Therefore, 2% is the better choice.

228 Appendix B
3.1 The aim is to signal humility.
3.2 The aim is to signal sincerity.
3.3 The aim is to signal respect.
3.4 The respect is profound.
3X 3Y
The aim is to signal not only humil- To signal humility, sincerity, and
ity and sincerity but also profound profound respect—that is the aim.
respect.
In the context of previous choices, sentences 3X and 3Y seem to offer a toss-up. Which would you choose? Perhaps another sentence?
4.1 The student should apologize.
4.2 The apology is for the interruption.
4.3 The student should say this.
4.4 "The class is a great learning experience."
4X 4Y
After apologizing for the interrupt Before saying that the class is "a tion, the student should say, "The great learning experience," the stu^ class is a great learning experience." dent should apologize for the inter'
ruption.
Sentence 4X is stronger because it delays the most important words to the end (where they belong). Also, the sequence of events in 4X seems clearer than in 4Y,
5.1 A moment's hesitation adds drama.
5.2 A furrowed brow adds intensity.
5.3 They suggest inner turmoil.
5X 5Y
As a way of suggesting an inner tur- A moment's hesitation and a fur-
moil, a moment's hesitation and a rowed brow add dramatic intensity
furrowed brow add both drama and by suggesting inner turmoil.
intensity.
Sentence 5Y seems more effective than 5X. First, its pattern contrasts with that of the previous choice (4X). Second, 5Y is six words shorter—and easier to read— than 5X.
6.1 The student may now allude to the paper.
6.2 The paper is a quest.

Sentence and Paragraph Strategies 229
6.3 The quest is fascinating and challenging.
6.4 The quest requires "just a little more time."
6X 6Y
The student may now allude to the An allusion to the paper as a quest
paper as a fascinating and challenge which is fascinating and challenging
ing quest—one that requires "just a but which requires "juct a little more
little more time." time" may now be made by the stu-
dent.
In context, sentence 6X is stronger, clearer, and shorter than 6Y; its dash and appositive are quite effective. Sentence 6Y, with its passive voice and wordiness, seems bloated by comparison.
Now that we've combined sentences and made our choices, let's see what the results look like in paragraph form:
(1) Although gaining an extension for a term paper is not easy, a time-tested formula works for some students. (2) The student's approach to the instructor should be shuffling and deferential, not arrogant or demanding. (3) The aim is to signal humility, sincerity, and profound respect. (4) After apologizing for the interruption, the student should say, "The class is a great learning experience." (5) A moment's hesitation and a furrowed brow add dramatic intensity by suggesting inner turmoil. (6) The student may now allude to the paper as a fascinating and challenging quest—one that requires "just a little more time."
PARAGRAPH ORGANIZATION
In the introduction to Unit 3, you learned about paragraphs as "clusters" or "packages" of sentences. Let's now explore further how some paragraphs are organized. While these points won't cover all situations, they may help you to think about the paragraphs in your own writing, particularly those that explain or persuade.
Most paragraphs in your school writing have a main point, or topic. On a midterm exam, for example, you might write about DNA molecules, the law of supply and demand, or the causes of child abuse. Each of these topics can be approached in different ways, but a time-proven method is to begin with a topic sentence. Such a sentence is usually a generalization that points the direction for sentences that follow.

230 Appendix B
Suppose that you want to compare two short stories. To do so, you might begin with a topic sentence like this:
In my opinion, "Nighthawk" is superior to "Summer Wind" for three reasons.
Notice how such a topic sentence sets up what follows. It tells the reader what stories are being compared, which of the stories is (in the writer's opinion) more effective, and how many reasons will be discussed. Such an approach is clear and businesslike. It gets the job done.
Of course, setting direction is one thing, but the next task is to develop the supporting details for the topic sentence. Do the next sentences fill the bill by providing reasons?
First, "Nighthawk" has fully developed, interesting characters rather than the stereotypes we find in "Summer Wind."
Second, the plot of "Nighthawk" creates a world that involves the reader, whereas "Summer Wind" is boringly predictable.
Third, the narrator of "Nighthawk" challenges us to think about real ideas, not the soap opera themes of "Summer Wind."
Such sentences develop the generalization in the topic sentence by offering a viewpoint on characterization, plot, and theme. Notice also that each supporting detail is tied to the topic sentence by the transition words first, second, and third.
Now suppose that the emerging paragraph concludes this way:
In what follows, I will amplify each of these points.
Suddenly our paragraph becomes an introduction to a more extended discus' sion. As readers, we can anticipate that we'll probably read three more "chunks" of text, each focused on a key point from the introductory paragraph. In that essay, it's logical that each point above will become the gist of a new topic sentence and that the writer will marshal evidence from the two stories to back up the assertions. Thus, this paragraph organizes the essay.
Here's what we've learned so far:
Paragraphs often have topic sentences followed by supporting details; a paragraph can stand by itself but also serve other functions in an essay; and the details in one paragraph can become the topic sentences in subsequent paragraphs.

Sentence and Paragraph Strategies 231
(Notice, incidentally, that this paragraph provides a summary and makes a transition to a new topic in this minilesson.)
Of course, not all paragraphs are as highly structured as the one compar¬ing two short stories. In fact, most aren't. Moreover, not all paragraphs have a "top-down" organization, with the topic sentence coming first. For example, compare the following patterns of organization. Can you imagine how each might be effective?
General-to-Specific Specifk'to-General
It is clear that the island Unemployment is rising.
needs a change in leadership. Inflation is at record levels.
Unemployment is rising. The tax structure [s unjust.
Inflation is at record levels. Enemies threaten security.
The tax structure is unjust. It is clear that the island
Enemies threaten security. needs a change in leader-
ship.
The left paragraph begins with a topic sentence, which is followed by supporting details. Conversely, the right paragraph has the topic sentence "emerge" from its list of reasons. Both paragraphs are organized, but they work in very different ways.
Most of your paragraphs will probably have the topic sentence up front. This strategy is effective when you're defining terms, explaining principles, and providing examples. But arguments may have more punch when the topic sentence comes last. In the next paragraph you see this principle of organization demonstrated.
Some people argue that colleges should not require freshmen to take a course in writing.
But, unfortunately, many students have real difficulties with written expression.
Eliminating such a requirement might be reasonable under other conditions.
If students were better trained in writing before college, or if college faculty would teach writing as part of their courses, freshmen writing would probably be unnecessary.
Clearly, however, the conditions described above do not exist at most schools.
Therefore, writing continues to be a reasonable requirement for most college freshmen.

232 Appendix B
As you can see, your purposes as a writer help you decide where to put your topic sentence. When purposes are clear, such decisions often take care of themselves.
PARAGRAPH PACKAGING
Recall from Unit 3 the discussion of paragraph packaging—the idea that paragraphs are groups of related sentences "packaged" together. The pack¬aging is basically invisible, of course—just white space at the beginning of a paragraph and more at the end. In block-style paragraphing—often found in business letters—each paragraph is surrounded by white space but not indented.
To understand how sentences are packaged into paragraphs, let's work with ten sentences to see where they might logically be divided into two packages (or chunks) of meaning. First read the sentences; then ask yourself where they should be separated.
L Some people, when faced with a writing problem, apply the "brute force" method.
2. They continue doing the same thing—only harder.
3. As they fume and fuss, scratching out what they have just written, they make countless false starts.
4. All this rewriting increases their mental and physical tension, which further blocks their writing.
5. Ironically, the harder they try, the worse things become.
6. Other people, when faced with similar blocks in their writing, take a more productive approach.
7. When things are not going well, they completely change what they are doing for a short period.
8. They sip a soft drink, get some exercise, or take care of an errand to use different muscles and energies.
9. This "sidestep" method releases tension and permits the sub-conscious mind to work on the problem.
10. Then they return to their writing with increased zest and cre-ativity.
It's possible, of course, to leave the sentences as they are, without any paragraph break. But most people, when studying these sentences, say that a "natural" break occurs between sentences 5 and 6. They visualize two

1
fe

Sentence and Paragraph Strategies 233
paragraphs—the first with sentences 1 to 5, the second with sentences 6 to 10. The first deals with a writing approach that often doesn't work, the second with one that works for some people. This seems like a logical division.
Let's suppose you now want to repackage the two paragraphs into four chunks of meaning—for a newspaper article, say. Since most newspapers have very brief paragraphs because of their narrow columns, such a task is not unusual. Take a few moments now to reread the sentences above. Where would you subdivide?
This division task is harder than the first one, and you may find disagree¬ment in your class about the "right" answer. However, many people repackage the ten sentences into four paragraphs like this: 1 to 3, 4 and 5, 6 to 8, and 9 and 10. Of course, such short paragraphs are not typical of most writing that you do in school or in the business world. The point here is to help you understand what paragraphs are—a means of grouping (or packag¬ing) sentences.
Let's now consider a different kind of packaging problem—the sentence that doesn't belong in a paragraph. This is a very common writing diffi-culty, even when writers have good ideas. Read the next sentences, and pick out the one sentence that should not be included here:
1. Getting into a productive frame of mind is a problem for many beginning writers.
2. The typical approach is to wait for "inspiration."
3. An alternative solution is to find a comfortable spot for writing, to come to this place regularly, and to set realistic goals for each work period.
4. Most beginners find that "inspiration" takes care of itself when these conditions are met.
5. Revision is another problem when one is learning to write.
Notice above that the first four sentences share the same topic—a productive frame of mind. With sentence 5 comes a switch in topic. There-fore, sentence 5 does not belong in this paragraph.
Here's a final paragraph with an out-of-place sentence. Read the sen-tences carefully, hunting for the one that doesn't belong.
1. Revision is another problem when one is learning to write.
2. Beginners often rely on a single draft, not realizing that good prose almost always requires revision.
3. Professionals, on the other hand, continually reread and revise, searching for better ways to express meanings.

234 Appendix B
4. Beginners often have trouble getting started, whereas profession¬als have regular writing habits and routines.
5. Differences in the quality (and amount) of revision usually stem from differences in attitude.
6. An uncaring attitude usually results in a single draft, but a caring attitude produces revisions of high quality.
The topic of the paragraph, expressed in sentence 1, is revision. Notice that all sentences except the fourth one deal with revision. Although sentence 4 (like sentences 2 and 3) contrasts beginners and professionals, it doesn't deal with the topic of revision. Therefore, it doesn't belong in the para¬graph.
You can learn a great deal about paragraph packaging simply by observing what good writers do—in newspaper articles, magazines, and books. Learn from the professionals. They won't steer you wrong.

Sentence and Paragraph Strategies 235
Credits
Baker, Russell. Reprinted from GROWING UP by Russell Baker, © 1982. Used with permission of Congdon &. Weed, Inc., Chicago.
Buscaglia, Leo, From the PAPA, MY FATHER; A CELEBRATION OF DADS by Leo Buscaglia. Copyright © 1989 by Leo F. Buscaglia, Inc. Reprinted by permission.
Crow Dog, Mary. From the book LAKOTA WOMAN by Mary Crow Dog, Copyright © 1990 by Mary Crow Dog & Richard Erdoes. Used with the permission of Grove/Atlantic Monthly Press. To order call 800-937-5557.
Dillard, Annie, AN AMERICAN CHILDHOOD. New York: HarperCollins Publishers, Inc., 1987, pp. 160-161.
Ishikawa, Yoshimi, From STRAWBERRY ROAD by Yoshimi Ishikawa, translated by Eve Zimmerman, published by Kodansha International Ltd. Copyright © 1991 by Yoshimi Ishikawa. Reprinted "by permission. All rights reserved.
Keller, Helen, THE STORY OF MY LIFE. Garden City: Doubleday & Company, Inc., 1954.
Kingston, Maxine Hong. From THE WOMAN WARRIOR by Maxine Hong Kingston. Copyright © 1975, 1976 by Maxine Hong Kingston. Reprinted by permission of Alfred A. Knopf, Inc.
L'Engle, Madeleine. Excerpt from TWO-PART INVENTION by Madeleine L'Engle. Copyright © 1988 by Crosswicks Ltd. Reprinted by permission of Farrar, Straus &. Giroux, Inc.
Maclean, Norman. From "A River Runs Through It" in A RIVER RUNS THROUGH IT AND OTHER STORIES by Norman Maclean. Copyright © 1976 by The University of Chicago. Reprinted by permission.
Meltzer, Milton. From STARTING FROM HOME by Milton Meltzer. Copyright © 1988 by Milton Meltzer. Used by permission of Viking Penguin, a division of Penguin Books USA Inc.
Moon, William Least Heat, BLUE HIGHWAYS: A JOURNEY INTO AMERICA. Boston: Little, Brown and Company, 1982, p. 181.
Soto, Gary. Reprinted from "The Catfish" in A SUMMER LIFE by Gary Soto. © 1990 by University Press of New England. By permission of University Press of New England.
Tan, Amy. Reprinted by permission of The Putnam Publishing Group from THE JOY LUCK CLUB by Amy Tan. Copyright © 1989 by Amy Tan.
Thomas, Lewis, ET CETERA, ET CETERA: NOTES OF A WORD-WATCHER. Boston: Little, Brown and Company, 1990, pp. 93-94.
Uchida, Yoshiko. From DESERT EXILE by Yoshiko Uchida. Copyright © 1982 by Yoshiko Uchida. Reprinted by permission of University of Washington Press.
ACA W.MIC RESOURCE CENTER MAHaSARAKHAM TJN1VEKSITY

1
Writing Reference Books Available from McGraw-Hill,..
® Random House Webster's College Dictionary
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With over 180,000 entries, the special McGraw-Hill Edition includes an introduction by renowned academician Richard Marius of Harvard College. Dr. Marius explores the reasons behind pursuing a college education and gives practical advice on using the dictionary to excel in college and beyond.
© Guide to the Use of Libraries and Information Sources, 7th Edition Jean Key Gates
Considered the book that no student can afford to be without, this reference source provides unmatched, comprehensive treatment of libraries, with a strong emphasis on the many kinds of library materials and services.
@ Working It Out: A Troubleshooting Guide for Writers
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Based on the simple belief that students write better when they discover reliable methods, this is a brief, easy-to-access compendium of tried-and-true means to idea generation, outlining, drafting, revising, and editing.
© Rules of Thumb: A Guide for Writers, 2nd Edition Jay Silverman, Elaine Hughes, and Diana Wienbroer
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